My husband is stationed half a country away from me and our son, who's four. I am here with both of our mothers so you can imagine some of the tensions. I currently have the flu and he didn't even call me to see if I am okay, and no I'm not. When I asked him why he didn't call, he said he was extremely busy. What a jerk!!! How dare he make light of my illness. I don't do that to him When he is sick I make sure I call him at least 4 times a day and try to cheer him up as often as possible. I told him how angry I was...his response....SO WHAT!!!! Well I am so through with him! I love him very much but I am not going to call me anymore until I receive an apology!
*Note from Anger Central
We are assuming that your husband is on active duty with the United States Military. We understand the stresses that both of you are under. Obviously we don't know what is going on, but the Crew at Anger Central hopes that this is just a minor tiff and that both of you have a long and happy life together. Just remember that both of you are responsible to the other. It may be hard, but each of you needs to try and put your spouse's needs first. From the age of your son, you have been married for about 5 years. You are at the toughest part in any marriage. Once you get past this, you should both be fine.
If your husband is deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan, please tell him from us, Thank you for everything you are doing. We also want to thank you as well. We know it is hard for you.
I seriously need a divorce.
I am sick and tired of my husband taking advantage of me, taking me for granted, and treating me like a mother instead of a wife. I have one baby girl, I don't need a grown baby also.
We've been married for nearly 9 years, and he's given me so much heartache and heartbreak over that time that I've been ready to kill myself more than once. My daughter's the only thing that's held me back.
He's cheated on me more than once, including long term affairs. He's a bullshit artist who attracts bullshitters and drama queens, and I'm so sick and tired of all this crap. He just doesn't know when to give it up.
I don't have any friends because of him... He's pretty much alienated everyone I've ever cared about. They don't want to be around me because of him.
I'm sick of excuses, and I'm sick of being here. If I could get out I would, but I have nowhere to go, so I'm stuck here until I can make it on my own.
after 24 years of marriage i get to be hurt because my weak husband realizes ugly chicks will fuck him and so many ugly chicks live here
I am married to a man that has no thought for anyone but himself. if he wants to do something he will do it regardless of who or how it hurts others. The dumbest part of his behavior is that he will hurt himself in the process and not care as long as he gets to say he did what he wanted. he takes from everyone 100% and may at times give 5% back while wanting credit and recognition for a full 100%. He gets pissed when I don't cater to his selfishness or call it what it is and put him in his place. He is the true version of asshole when it comes to being selfish. I see now why the man has so much bad Karma coming his way. And yeah, we are in the middle of a divorce. I won't tolerate that behavior in my life. I am worth a lot. If he can't step up to the plate then he is out of the game.
The man I married was brilliant, so how did he get to be such an IDIOT? He doesn't know how to take care of his kids - he doesn't remember to feed them, runs them ragged even when they're sick, doesn't think about them when planning HIS day, doesn't even pay attention to them when he is home, and acts like he's just too busy to be bothered. The man I married was awesome in bed. Now it's in-out, done, whatever - and he wants to know why I don't want to have sex anymore? Oh, and how 'bout the fact that we both quit smoking 7 years ago - only he didn't quit, and lied about it for 5 years? And he wants to know why I don't trust him. What else are you lying about? I can't trust you with the kids, can't trust you with my life, can't trust you with a simple conversation because who knows what is really true? Everyone said 'Marriage is NOT the answer.' WOW, were they right! I'm in it for the long haul, but my god, why do I feel like I'm living with a BRICK? Nothing, but nothing, gets through.
My dumbass husband is so damn mean. He decided a few weeks that he was going to do the bills since they seem to be stressing me out so much. But he is not doing them. Since he made this plan he has not paid one damn bill. I asked him today why he is not paying them and he said "well stupid, you keep spending all the money so i can't pay them". Which is not true. I bought groceries and some medicine for the kids but that's it, unless you count the beer run i made for HIM. This morning he got angry because i asked him if he was going to my moms to finish work on her house and he said well what do i need to do and i said i didn't know since i was not the one doing it. He has been doing all the damn work so he should know what needs to be finished not me. Anyhow he started yelling and cursing at me in front of the kids then took his coffee mug and shattered it in the kitchen sink. WTF. Last week he got mad because I made fun of him doing "air quotes" " " " with his fingers and ripped the medicine cabinet off the bathroom wall and shattered the mirror. The asshole has a serious anger problem that he blames completely one me pushing his buttons. I don't know what to do. He actually thinks if we divorce that I will have to leave the house with the kids and go somewhere else while he keeps his fat ass here. Not going to happen. I have not worked since we have been married and have to take care of two kids so what judge does he think is going to say he can have the house and kick me and the kids out on our ass. I think he just thinks I am stupid and believe this shit so that I don't leave. Not the case. I am just waiting for the right time to get the hell out of this miserable marriage. I didn't want to get married in the first place. I was begged and pressured into it. Which was dumb of me. But now i know and hopefully I can get out soon so me and kids can be happy.
I don't like my butt hole husband. He is rude, selfish, and
blames all the worlds problems on me. He broke the mirror/shelf in our bathroom
by ripping it off the wall because he got mad at me. He broke a coffee mug that
went to a nice set that I got for xmas because I didn't say what he wanted to
hear. He shattered the glider/rocker that was given to me a baby shower gift by
my sisters (cost $400) he has snapped phones in half and a TV remote. Smashed
holes in our wall and doors, ripped a banister out of the house and so on. When
he gets angry with me he destroys things. He destroyed an antique crystal candy
dish of mine and numerous other things. I am going to divorce this asshead very
soon. I am waiting on a job to start then I am saving my money and the kids and
I are out of here. I have told him to leave but he wont. He says I should leave
cause this is his house and he is going to live here. So he actually thinks if
we divorce I will be out on my ass with the kids while he sits in the big house
with the big nice vehicle. Not going to happen. No judge would say sure you keep
the house and car and she gets nothing. I have pictures of all the shit he has
destroyed and he has even left bruises on me from shoving me and stuff. He
doesn't hit me or anything only shoves cuz I'm usually trying to attack him
because he has called me a crazy bitch and said I'm stupid so yes I do go
berserk and hit him sometimes. But there's only so much verbal abuse you can
take without snapping and smacking someone. I can't stand his mother she is a
pill popping lunatic who acts like a 4 year old and dresses like a 9 year old.
She is constantly high on vicoden and muscle relaxers. and he actually thinks I
should let her drive my kids around high ......wtf........not happening.
I just want to get the hell out of this shit asap. so tired of the same crap day after day........its hard being the root of all evil.......
I hate my alcoholic husband. He comes home from work every night and drinks himself into oblivion.I come home and have to clean and cook for his lazy ass. We pay two mortgages because the housing market is so horrible and he expects me to run over to the other house and water and mow the lawn! We never have any money, because he runs out every week to buy pot! If we don't sell our house, we won't even be able to have Christmas with our family. This weekend he got so drunk, ran out of beer and then drove drunk to the store. He already has a DUI on his record. If he gets another one, it will surely ruin our lives, once again. When he is sober he can be wonderful. That is a rarity anymore. His drunkenness disgusts me. We rarely have sex because he is wasted all the time and it is a complete turn off. He will either kill himself or go to jail again, for drinking and driving. I'm only concerned if he kills someone. Otherwise, I truly could care less if he kills himself. He will never quit. I need to get more life insure on him. One day I will be free.
*Note from Anger Central
We have a suggestion that you should consider. Leave him. He's a loser and has reached the point where he is endangering you and others. Find a lawyer and also speak with your family. If he won't get help then invite him to seek other opportunities elsewhere. It's very rare that we write this type of a Note from Anger Central, but once in a while, we do.
My Husband is a Controlling, Free-Loading, Squatter, who hasn't latched off of his mama's titty yet!! He hasn't had a steady job in over three years, he doesn't have a drivers license, he doesn't have a car, he works part time making minimum wage, he doesn't pay ANY of the household bills, he lies on me to his mama, he treats me like I am obligated to do EVERYTHING for him like his mama does.
He destroys things in our home, DEMANDS that I do what he says when he says it, treats me like a steaming turd and talks to me like I am a red-headed bastard of a step-child. He throws away the dishes for no reason, he lies to no end about pretty much everything, he blames the world for his faults.
He eats like a horse in the middle of the night. He is afraid of the dark, he doesn't sleep. He is a punk who can't fight his own battles who always has to call his mama or his cousins when he is in trouble.
He lies.. wait I already said that, he doesn't pay his child support and when his kids come to spend the weekend with us he is too busy playing X-box to spend time with them or he has to go and stay out all night so I get to be the baby-sitting step mama. Since he doesn't respect me his kids don't respect me either.
He doesn't pay any bills yet he tried to kick me out of the apartment. He got the locks changed to our apartment because he claims to have lost his keys however, he refuses to pay the fee for it. That SOB!!
I want to divorce him so good !! I just don't want to move back home with my mother, no way JOSE !! I do not want an eviction on my credit either.... Marriage is what God wants for us but don't marry the wrong one let me tell you... I married a lying, manipulative, cold-hearted, in-sensitive, evil, low-down, dirty, lousy, grimy, grumpy, dopey, sleepy, sneezy, BUM !!
Angered and Enthralled !!!
My husband is pretty much a rat-bastard, he is a 30 year old mama's boy squatter !! We have argued fifty-leven times over him just simply growing up and growing some nuts !! He depends on his mother for everything, he's so damn indecisive he calls his mother for everything, " look mama my chili came out gud" "mama, can you wash my undies ?"
He hasn't had a job in a month of Sundays, he finally got a job at a home store makin minimum wage and bitchin at me about how he's the damn man and he can't even afford to buy toilet paper to wipe his ass !!
I have been trying and trying to make our marriage work, we have only been married 10 months and already he has came at me with a ninja sword, thrown my things in the street, had another woman in our home and had the locks changed while I was away...
Why is he such a RETARD, he lives with me scott free, he doesn't even have a drivers license, he is just a bum, I have my PhD in Philosophy he has his in being a freeloader !!
I am so mad I could Sh*t on his collarbone !! I want to just let one rip in his face while he sleeps .. I know thats triflin but he farts in his sleep.. when ever he does sleep, then he jacks off more than any one I know in the world .. I am suprised he has any sperm left as many knuckle children as he has popped off .. YUCK.
He has two kids already, both by the same woman, we get to keep them from time to time but when they come he is too busy playing X-Box to spend time with them and so they end up being stuck with me... I want to get a divorce, but stupid me put his name on the lease although he doesn't pay jack crap ! He is one rusty cunt who needs to stop swinging from his mamas titty.
My husband drank for over 10 years. 3 years ago, he went through rehab. He remained sober for 9 months. Then, he relapsed. His doctor gave him 4 types of anti-depressives! He didn't question it or look for a new doctor. Anything thing he can put into his body, he will. So, shortly after, he lost his job for erratic behavior at work. he continued to drink and take the anti-depressants. He freaked out one night and tried to attack my brother. He got taken away to a psych ward. They released him the next day because he was not crazy, just high and drunk.
So I kicked him out. He lasted 7 days by himself then tried to kill himself by taking all his medication. He stayed two weeks in the icu (Tylenol overdose=bad thing) then two weeks in a psych ward. He got out and started a out-patient rehab. He did well. they also prescribed lithium. He was happy, relaxed and had a sense of humor. He found a fantastic job--much better than the first. I let him come home. He stopped taking his lithium. He got depressed. A new shrink gave him new anti-depressants. He started drinking again.
Our children are getting depressed. We can't have kids over very much because we never know what's going to happen. He has stumbled downstairs in his underwear in front of other kids before. Now that its xmas and new years, my husband is celebrating by drinking 24 beers a day.
I want him out. When I bring it up, he tells me I would be killing him just like last time. He is using suicide to control me. I am pissed off. If he did kill himself I wouldn't be too upset, except it would really hurt our daughters. We live in a small town so everyone would know--the girls would have to live with the stigma He is holding us hostage.
*Note from Anger Central
Much as we hate to say it, it's time for you to take your children and leave. Explain to your children that their father is very sick, and that he is a danger to himself and to them. Do not turn them against their father, just say that because he is sick you can't be around him. Hopefully he will hit the rock bottom point and be able to turn himself around. From what you have written, he may just self destruct first.
If you do this, always allow him to see his children, albeit under close supervision. He might actually clean himself up and become a good father and useful member of society again. We would also recommend a careful check of these drugs being prescribed to him. To often these doctors will just hand this stuff out like candy and actually make things worse. We hope that things do work out for you, but your first priority MUST be to your children. Also, don't forget that substance abuse might be hereditary. Make sure your children understand that they might have a problem down the road if they aren't careful.
I am sick of my perfect husband. He claims to be so right about everything. Sits on his fat ass all day because he is disabled. More like he is just fucked up in the head. He has chronic pain that he will do nothing about. He goes to drs, gets prescriptions that he never fills. Then proceeds to the liquor store. Little does he know, I am divorcing his fat ass and getting my crap out of his life. Be careful of the scumbags hunting for women on the internet. That is exactly what this slug did... found someone to support him. He put on an act for the first 5 years and then the real scum rose to the surface. OUTTA MY LIFE DIRT BAG
My husband of 10 years is an insensitive jerk!! He is money clueless when it comes to taking care of business-like paying the freaking rent!!!!!!!!Oh God he makes me head hurt, he is so full of crap. I can barely trust what he says cause he has lied so freaking much!! I should have known better. He comes from freaking RETARDS!!
My husband pisses me off so bad. I can't stand him sometimes. He thinks money grows on trees and there is a never ending supply. Possessions don't mean anything and he thinks having things are gonna make things better and I just want to save money. Things aren't important to me. They don't mean anything. I am so angry and I am tired of arguing. Make him go away.
My husband is not a very smart man. One day we were at my sisters house visiting…a high school classmate pulls into her driveway because she saw us there. No big deal - I said hi to her and proceeded to go into the house to visit my sister. My husband remained outside, conversing with the former classmate. Again, as I said before, no big deal. The former classmate, (Who I will call CR for the sake of simplicity) had a huge crush on my husband back in the day. She had went as far as to tell my sisters husband (who is CR’s cousin) that her high school husband (she got married in the 11th-12th grade) and my husband had a fight over her…my stupid husband denies all of the above.
CR and my Husband, PT, talked for a very long time. PT finally came into the house, ready to go. We were riding along in the car: PT handed me the two business cards that CR gave him, and all was well until he turned and said to me:
“CR says that I married the wrong person”.
And for about 30 seconds, I sat there utterly baffled until I thought about it: What kind of conversation was CR and PT having that would even prompt that sort of remark?
I turned to my husband and said:
“What were you guys talking about that would prompt her to even say something like that”?
My husbands initial stammering and stuttering for an answer eventually became a refusal to answer.
I looked down and remembered that I had this lady’s business cards in my hand. I told him that I would be calling her to find out exactly what was said. I did call her and could not contact her - so I e-mailed her. Of course she did not respond. I knew I would see her around somewhere, because we stay in the same area….
Several weeks later I saw her in our local Wal-Mart. She had the nerve to try to cause a big scene as if I had done something to her - when she and my husband were the two idiots talking about me!! And I told her off right in the middle of Wal-Mart - my stupid husband had the nerve to try to take her side - and he got told off too, in front of the whole store.
My whole point in relating this whole story is that if my husband was that displeased with me, then he should have told me, not some slut that liked him in high school. That whore had 3 cold sores on her face when I saw her…ewww……
the husband whom smushes all friends ships by fucking ever one and then the olny friend thats a guy and thinks im fucking him he's a toally fucking ass. he's lazy and don't work and spends all my money. i love him but don't know if i hate him more,we never go out together or anything but me and my new friend do now my husband found out cause i didn't tell him and thinks i'm fucking him all we do is have fun and thats all, fuck all husbands
My husband can be the cruelest man I've ever met and I've never loved anyone more.
In some ways, he's a stereotype of the abusive man. He was trained to be. His Italian, aging, wealthy father married a beautiful, unintelligent young woman who he knew only briefly from the Philippines. She bore him two children and cooked and cleaned his mansion. She was permitted allowances. Everyone says they loved one another very much, implying that it's a culture I don't understand. He gave her spending money and owned an illegal casino where he stayed all night gambling with old men. He was shot in the face when my husband was one. When he hit his wife, it was agreed by both that it was her fault, and she apologized to the children.
When I met my husband he told me he was a hard-working, honest man with an excess of money from inheritance and a law degree. The money didn't matter to me, and I only found it annoying how often he spoke of his law degree. We were married quickly-- I had never loved someone so much and he felt the same for me. Almost immediately after we married, he became the cruelest man I'd ever met. He blamed me for all his failures, even those that occurred before we'd met. He taunted me daily and I cried everyday. I many times begged him on my knees to just say one kind word to me. He would only degrade me by making me go down on him, and looking up at his cold face I felt more misery then I'd ever known. This was a symbolic act-- he was trying to make me into a submissive wife. He raped me once and beat me many times. Our cats are terrified on him. Even in happy moods, he stomps loudly throughout the house, it's his nature. Those 6 months after we were married were the worst. I tried to do everything he asked, to become the perfect wife. And the harder I tried the worse he treated me. He no longer had any respect for me, an independent and intelligent woman made servant, and I had none either. He called me stupid and mimicked me regularly. If I tried to talk to him about how he treated me and how it hurt me, he would unceremoniously dismiss me. I hated him, but I never longer for him more. Any glimpse of kindness, any moment of being held, any apology at all, I treasured to such a degree that none of it felt that bad at all.
He used to treated to leave me all the time, which created an anxiety in me so great that my chest constricted so tight I felt I was having a heart attack. I couldn't breath on these occasions, which would sometimes last for days, and I cried continuously, pacing the room to try and run down my horrible anxiety. To me, his threatening to leave me was always the worst, because I have such a tragic fear of abandonment. He knows that, which is why it was his greatest and most used weapon against me.
The things he's said to me and how it made me feel!-- a new wife with such hopes of happiness with the only man I'd ever loved.
I discovered my method of trying to be perfect so that he would realize it wasn't me causing all the trouble and start to gain insight to his condition did not work. It only made things worse.
In the fall I had him arrested for mercilessly beating my head against the side of the car as he drove, screaming curses at me. He was in jail overnight and when he got out he cursed me even more. How could I do something like that to him?! He shouted repeatedly, and even recounted all his discomforts throughout the night-- a mental bed, no pillow, a scratchy blanket, and he felt cold. They wouldn't let him have his blazer.
Since then I've learned he needs a bitch. No someone as out-of-control as he is, but someone who isn't going to take it and will shout back. I've also learned to walk away before he gets angry enough to beat me. I've convinced him to go to therapy and he's on a great deal of medication, which helps. He's able to work full-time and most of the time he treats me with kindness and respect.
But he certainly isn't the man I thought I was marrying...
*Note from Anger Central
As we've said in the past when a woman posts about being abused...
LEAVE NOW! There are plenty of public and private groups who can help you. This bozo needs help and he doesn't look like he wants to get it. The Crew at Anger Central does not want to read about you being "Disappeared", or worse. He isn't worth it.
An example.. This is one phone call, no pauses, happened 5 minutes ago. this is normal.
H-"Honey can you find someone to take you to lunch"
Me- "I'll ask around and then call you back when I find out, ok honey?"
H- "Well im sure you will find someone, just call me when you find out."
H-"Make sure you find out though, and call me"
Me-"ok, im gonna go ask right now.."
H- "then call me back so i can know whats going on"
Me "ok honey, but i have to get off the phone first, so i Can ask..."
H- "You know what, find a f-ing ride, and find a f-ing ride home to, your being a b-ch and you dont f-ing listen. *click*
I have been married 17 years. Have three children. My spouse is a drunk, selfish, inconsiderate bastard, who thinks of only him self. Because of him I have no friends, family, only him!! lucky me (not). I am unemployed and have been for several years. I have very little skills, don't drive, don't have a pot to piss in. He says if I leave I cannot take the children. Anyway I would have no where to go. He has made sure of that.. I need out. But, I am trapped in a black hole.. HELP!!
*Note from Anger Central
There are organizations and groups, private, governmental and religious that can help you. We don't know where you are located, (Obviously), but there are people who can and will help you. Just let your fingers do the walking. You might also like to know that the courts tend to favor the mothers over the fathers. Document everything.
Also talk to family, (Yours), friends you can trust etc. If the situation has turned violent, get out now and head for the nearest shelter, police station or church. It will be tough at first, but one of two things will happen. Your husband will be shocked into getting help he needs, or you will be starting a new life without him.
I am so angry at my husband. This past weekend we went to an annual family reunion. When we got there my husband sat down. I came in talked to a few people and then went over to my husband. All I did was look at him and smile. He went off on me. He yelled, "Don’t stare at me". Then he continued to yell about how he didn't want any attention drawn on him. He told me that if I didn't stop, that he would go sit in the car. Then yelled, "go over there and sit down". All of that because I looked at him, smiling. To avoid conflict, I did go sit down. Tears streamed down my face. He embarrassed me in front of a lot of people. I had to tell people that my eyes were watering because I had allergies. He was so mean to me. I don’t deserve to be treated the way he treats me. He makes me so angry.
The first night I met my husband I was drunk. Had poison ivy all over my legs and "rosemary" was ending, so I never would have slept with anyone. Yet he did. Guess I had low self esteem. He was cute and popular. Since then he's hurt himself mysteriously drinking so many times. He comes back from a night of drinking with cuts all over his face. He's had our money and goods stolen from us when he's like this. He's extremely verbally abusive and yells at me loudly until 3:00 in the morning. I work a lot and we have two kids. BTW I have multiple three degrees and make considerably more than him. At least he's quit calling me a whore and a slut in front of the kids. He pushed me down before work the other day and threatened to punch my face in (hangovers make him angrier) then called the police when I screamed loud enough for the neighbors to hear. Didn't send him to jail because he's put us in such a hole financially. Didn't even work last week but bitched when we ran out of money. He's almost killed me trying to have sex with me when he was drunk. Knocked me out by pushing me down and still had the sex anyway. I had an affair was the best most satisfying sex ever in my life was in heaven (didn't start until husband hit me!) but it was still wrong. Since then he's hacked me and my mom's personal info, e-mails, phone records, called my bosses, harasses me. I have to guard every word I say. Can't split up because he won't fix the house to sell. I've assumed his credit card debts over and over because I have lower interest rates and now have a substantial debt to my name. He says that's due to my spending and swears he didn't know about this even though we've discussed it so many times. His alcoholism and smoking (cigarettes) is causing him to be easily endangered, make stupid decisions, have short term memory loss etc. If he's frustrated with me because I ask him to make wise monetary decisions he walks out of the house without a coat on his jacket and leaves for a day or two. Drinking and spending nights at hotels. He's such a liar when it comes to drinking too. He makes other husband act bad too so much that I hear it from their wives. Son-of-a-bitch.
My husband and I have been together for 9 years - we have 3 kids. He's gone during the week working & home on the weekends. Mother's day he gets pissed off when I ask him if we were go out to eat like we normally do on birthdays, mothers day, fathers day & anniversaries. He told me that I ain't his mother so why should I be treated special. He tells me to stay home with kids since daycare & gas is so expensive then when I need something he bitches at me to get a job by the end of the week. I have a bad tooth that I've put off getting fixed for 5 years - today I had to go to the dentist - the pain was too much to handle. I found out that I have an infection inside my gums above the bad tooth. I called my husband & told him about it - of course he ignores me until he came home tonight. I mentioned that I had another appointment in the morning to fix the tooth. He starts bitching and says that all care about is my tooth & I don't give a shit about anything else.... He literally gives me a list of chores that he expects to be done by the time he returns from work - holy hell if I mess up on a chore. He gets hateful & bitches......until he's horny. then he'll apologize long enough to get what he wants then it's back to being an asshole. We fight all the time - UNLESS his buddy who works for the same company is around. If they're together working out of town - hubby is nice until he comes home or is out of earshot from buddy. I hate being treated like a child. He's always asking the parent to child questions which make me feel as tall as my daughter. As soon as he comes home - he has to inspect everything to make sure it was done right while he was gone. God forbid if a guy talks to me!!
Why do i put up with being verbally abused by my husband? Everyone thinks he is the picture perfect husband, and is so innocent. He makes me out to be the "Bitch" and turns everything around and makes me the one to blame all of the time. So i have to wonder, is it my fault? He is never home, and when he is, he sits in front of the tv, he never talks to me or my daughter. He lies, he keeps things from me. If i ever confront him or ask a question that makes him mad, he calls me names like dumbass and stupid fat bitch he says no one likes me, that i have no friends because no one likes me, he tells me that i am lazy and all i do is eat all the time..he says he can't even stand to look at me.. then after the fight he says he didnt mean the things he said and that i am the one that makes him say those things..he has hit me and shoved me down before. I'm to the point to where i don't go out in public much, and i cant go out to eat, because i think i am fat and ugly. I dont know what to think anymore, i take a lot of my anger out on other ppl i love, i can get so mad and say the worst things to my daughter, i always tell her i am sorry, i love her more than anything, but she has had to put up with my husband treating us like we dont exist. I dont really want to live anymore, i feel like i am worthless and that i should be dead. It scares me because i have always been a strong person, and now i am not strong at all.
*Note from Anger Central
We started writing some suggestions then noticed you said he had hit you. Time to say good bye to him. There are people and groups who can help you. Your husband is an abuser. Perhaps he can be salvaged, but we doubt it. Seek help and advice from a neutral third party.
As to your physical appearance, we can't say obviously. If you are eating more then you should, we would guess it is a reaction to the abuse. Get thee out of there, get yourself and your daughter to a place of safety. Then if you want, start working on your appearance. First and foremost, get help soon!
What can I say I do love my husband but after 12years, he is starting to disrespect me. He says things that hurt my feeling, starts projects and never finishes, hardly ever plays with kids, acts like he is to busy to do things I need him to do. He is only happy when her gets what he wants and to top it off never puts anything away. If he buys something it sits their forever and if I put it away and he can't find it, then I will never hear the end of it. I am tired of being his mother and roommate.
I have been married to the asshole mentioned above for 18 long years. Every time I mention it is time to get a divorce he throws the kids into the picture and makes us go to counseling. Every time I think counseling will help us this time. We can get through it now.
Well our counselor has decided to throw the husband out. He is wasting her time, and doesn't want to even try to get better. He says he hates women, his wife and daughters. She would like him to go and see a male counselor now, by himself to deal with his issues.
He refuses to do anything to help with any of his children. He plays computer games all the time. He treats me with disrespect and meanness whenever I try to talk with him. He spends most of the money so it is hard to pay the bills. He has had many affairs. He acts like a child. It worries me how he talks to and acts around his children. He goes to work only if I beg him to each morning.
Why do I stay? Well lets see. He insisted on me leaving school and remaining barefoot and pregnant. Now I am nearing 40 with no education, no job experience (because he refused to let me work), and 5 children. I have secretly had surgery to make it impossible to have further children. The lawyer I talked to said I could only get 40% of his meager income to take care of the kids with. With no education and job experience, I worry about the kids and how to financially take care of them and stay.
He won't divorce me, because I take care of everything. And, he gets to have sex with whoever he pleases, do nothing for the kids, take care of no house jobs, and live the way he wants.
I hate him.
*Note from Anger Central
We wish we could offer more help for you. It's obvious you are in a terrible situation. Do you have friends or family that can help out? We would also recommend a second legal opinion. It sounds like the shark you spoke with lost his teeth. A good lawyer would see your situation and at the very least point you to some private organizations that can help you out. We wish there was more we could do for you.
omg . I can't stand his stupid fat alcoholic ass any longer. He actually said I want him dead! um excuse me he drinks enough liquor to fuel two bachelor parties a day and Im the bad one? Yeah I made his liver fall out. I drove him to drink. I'm a bitch on wheels. He doesnt need my help he's doing fine on his own.
Heinouse act #1: I had a very painful surgery and after i came home I sent him to fill my script for pain meds. He ate half of them and never told me. I call the Doctor a few days later for more as I'm completely fried and The Doc acts Like Im a drug addict, Not till later did I figure out what Butthead the hubby did.
Heinous act #2: He constantly overdrafts the bank account buying booze. after I finally wrestle the card away, I'm a Coniving control freak bacause I want to pay the mortgage and the bills. Just shoot me now, please.
Heinouse act #3: My dad passed away a few months ago. I spent a year and a half looking after him. any help from dipshit? Hell no!! Anyway 3 weeks after dad passed Heinous husband says "how long are you going to use this My Dad died as an excuse"? He got a big slap across the face for that. i couldnt help it. and the neighbors got an earful as I screamed it would never be long enough go to hell you fucking Creaton. I guess I will not be asked to play Bunco again anytime soon.
I had to take his truck away so he wouldnt kill someone driving around drunk and now he drives a scooter. at least he can only hurt himself on it. However I am once again a coniving control freak because I wont let him drive a pickup truck around obliterated.
Heinouse act #4 He went to rehab for a month stayed at my daughter"s house for another month, all the while not bringing in any money and me and the kids scrimping along. He comes home and say "WELL THAT WAS A NICE VACATION" AND PROMPTLY DRINKS TILL HE PASSES OUT.
Needless to say he can go to rehab when I go to RIO. Fucker.
Fart knocking booze smelling ass muncher. The whole half of the house he lives in (hell yes he is NOT going to be in my SPACE, PERIOD!) Smells like a brewery. He looks like he's 150 years old has Hep C to boot (thank god we didnt get it!!) and wonders why Ive lost that lovin feeling. Gee I just dont like stew bums I guess.
And diseases. Me and the kids had to be tested repeatedly to be sure we didnt have it. He swears he never did hard drugs. Oh my ass! He lied to get me to marry him and then snuck around for God knows how long until dummy me figured it out. I hope he does hard drugs now so his liver will give up the ghost. If he think his kids are going to donate a piece of theirs he's gotta another thing comimg. No way. no how. he actually wanted to change the insurance so it would cover transplants and wants his son (he's a minor) to have "bloodwork done" meaning tissue typing. OVER MY COLD DEAD BODY WILL THAT EVER HAPPEN. My son has my blood type not his and and an RH factor . so the point is moot. I dont think it's appropriate to drink when you know you shouldn't. then expect your CHILD to rescue you. not to mention the thousands of dollars spent on Interfuron treatments to save his life from the HEP c. My son knows he has to ace school because his college fund is gone.
And the whole time asshole Hubby runs around telling everyone
who will listen what a bitch I am And it's all my fault He drinks.
There is a parable about the "just Man" who has to put up with all the bullshit on the planet so everyone else can have a good life I guess you can call me Just. as in just a dum ass.
*Note from Anger Central
Much as we hate to say this, it's obvious that your husband won't change. For you and your children, it may be time to seek other opportunities elsewhere. Also, you should talk with your children about drinking. Make them aware that if they aren't careful they might also become alcoholics. It does seem to be passed down. If they decide not to drink when they are of legal age, more power to them. Good luck.
My husband of 14 years is a complete and total asshole! He thinks of no one but himself. He drinks from the time he hits the door after work till the time he passes out (his bedtime or when the beer runs out) Our 9 year old daughter thinks the world of him but can't understand his drunken mood swings. I really have to leave him because I don't want her to think this is how a good relationship should be. I am afraid she will hate me for leaving him. I feel trapped
I got married about 19.5 years ago. Life was rosy when our children were growing up until they hit their teenage years. My husband began to drink heavily and in 2003 got a DUI. He should have died, he was very lucky he didn't kill himself or anyone else. He was given house arrest and a very hefty fine. We have had financial problems which he believes in all his heart are the results of my mismanagement.
He quite drinking for about six months and now drinks again. Last night he polished off a six pack of beer. He no longer drinks hard liquor and feels his drinking is under control. When he drinks he is verbally abusive. I don't know what to do.
I have developed IBS, Diabetes and anxiety due to his anger
When we disagree, my husband has a habit of jumping in and saying, "Oh, so now I'M the asshole?" Thing is, when he says it, he's almost invariably BEING an asshole! He gets sanctimonious, superior and acts so fucking put upon that others have asked me how I can put up with it. I'm no saint, but when your wife has been supporting you for 5 years while you "build your business"? It's time to back the fuck off, buddy. ARRRRRRGH! Some days I think I'd be better off without him and all his fucking issues.
I made the biggest mistake of my life by marrying a man that I never should have a few years ago. I knew him as a young boy twenty some odd years ago but after reuniting, his family failed to tell me that Dan had become a terrible alcoholic thru the years and that he had been in and out of different rehabs unsuccessfully, as well as been in trouble with the law, including spending time in jail.
He also had one of the worst tempers I had ever witnessed or known. This unbelievable temper had also got him in trouble with 2 ex wives, as he was physically violent and controlling with both. He was charged with domestic violence with his second wife. Dans three children also had very little to do with him due to his unpredictable behavior.
I never knew any of this until after I had already married him, there were no signs or warnings but I would soon start having my own terrible experiences right after we were married.
Dan would notoriously start an argument as an excuse to leave so he could go drink, usually a day or two later he was sorry and wanted to come home, this became a vicious pattern over and over. Last Christmas I had had enough, he come home drunk and called the police and made a false report on me, in the midst of the police coming, Dan had sandwiched me in between our front door and screen door and was pushing the heavy door on my entire body that was halfway in and halfway out. By the time the police arrived, they saw the marks on my arm and seen that Dan was intoxicated, Dan was arrested immediately.
His father made a couple of calls to me asking if I would call the prosecutor and tell them that it was an accident, he wanted me to lie to get his son out of trouble! It was at that time that I broke all ties with his parents, I was starting to see that they were part of the problem.
Several months later I decided to separate from Dan, I wanted him to get real help or else it was over. We were separated for 8 months, during this time he had snuck into his 401k and took out $20,000 to buy a corvette, his father had him put the corvette in his dads name so the money couldnt be traced so that the car couldnt be taken from him. That money was supposed to be ours for when we were old, so that we could live on it. Since then, I have heard three different stories about the 401k, to which none of them I believe. He also has a terrible time with telling the truth and being honest. I have found out that Dan has all the characteristics of an alcoholic- although he doesnt feel he has a problem, nor does he think that hes an alcoholic.
During our separation, he was arrested again, drunk driving, this time he ended up going to jail. He was in there for approximately 4 months. He had violated his probation that he was given from the domestic violence charge, because of this, his parents thought that their son was going to jail because of me.
My problem is this, I want out, I cant stand him, he has caused so much pain and turmoil for everyone and still has not changed but I have no job I have tons of applications in everywhere but with the economy, I am struggling to find something and I need my bills paid. I dont know where to turn or what to do, all I know is that I want out!!
*Note from Anger Central
We wish we could give you some advice, but this is beyond us. Do you have any family that can help you out? As to the car, taking money out of a 401K requires a significant tax penalty. You may want to check and see that it was paid. I would recommend legal advice, (There have to be a few pro bono lawyers around who can advise you), to start separating yourself and assets from this loser as soon as possible.
We will say this much. The Webmaster reads all these stories of bad husbands and works very hard not to be like them with Mrs. Webmaster. Good luck to you.
My husbands brother lives with us and we're newlyweds. We've been married for 6 months and its been complete hell from the start. My husband cares more about what his brother wants than what i want and cares more about his brothers opinion than mine. I've tried talking to him about but it doesn't do any good. He still blows off everything i say. why am i sitting here alone on new years eve? because my husband and his brother made plans and didn't bother to tell me. I thought i was supposed to be the most important person in my husbands life. so why aren't i?
I think my husband is demon-possessed. One minute he says he loves me and thinks I'm beautiful and the next he is telling me I'm stupid and crazy. In his Hyde mode, he leaves the house and doesn't come home, won't help with any chores even on garbage day and tells me he is going to get out as soon as the housing market gets better. Why wait? We have been married 16 years and this keeps happening over and over. Our sex life is non-existent. I don't want to live like this anymore. I don't deserve it. I found this site by Googling something like, "My husband is a dickhead." Ladies, either we are all married to the same man or these guys all escaped from the same maximum security prison. Maybe it's a moron epidemic. Why do we do this to ourselves? There is a serious societal flaw repeating itself over and over. Is there really any such thing as a good man? These guys really are dickheads.
Angry?! O, boy, am I beyond that. Way, way, way beyond that.
I've been so angry for so long that it has now reached self-fuelling stage and has simply become my normal state of being. Yep, it's the usual story of marriage and out-growing someone. No, it's not a one-way street. I'm partly to blame. But I don't care anymore: I'm too angry to give a damn about how much each of us is to blame. Actually, I can't believe I've reached this point. It is, believe it or not, the most liberating thing that has ever happened to me in my life. I woke up a couple of days ago and realized that I no longer care if my husband approves of anything I do. I no longer want sex with him. I no longer love him, I no longer respect him, I no longer want him. I have zero problem supporting him financially (hey, don't ask me: I've just never had a problem with him using my money any way he wants or even using the bulk of it and he's the same about his - well, he was when he was also earning. I also really dislike shopping so I suppose I never ended up spending money on anything frivolous. We're so much the same that it's probably a huge chunk of the problem).
We have two fabulous kids and my husband is a huge part of the reason why. He is a brilliant father. But he sucks as a husband. Alcoholic - tick. Verbally abusive when drunk - tick. Have either of the kids been hurt when he's drunk? Tick, tick, tick. He yells at them and absolutely terrifies them although they're older now and I'm so much less of a wimp that he has to get through me first and hasn't succeeded for a long time now. It's pretty hard to get through someone who is utterly determined not to let you do it.
Once, he dropped one of them off the nappy change table. Fortunately not even a bruise out of that one but I never let him touch the kids when drunk again. Yes it was an accident. So what? It shouldn't have happened and it only happened because he was drunk so, bloke-with-the-IQ-of-a-slug, stop drinking! O, yeah, Einstein that he is, this didn't occur to him at all. No, he's not physically violent to the kids or me. But his verbal violence can be just as horrible.
So, matey, stuff you. I'm not useless, stupid, totally lacking in understanding of anything as you continually tell me. I'm not someone who you have a God-given right to yell and scream at whenever you want a whipping girl. You're the alcoholic. Major problem. Pleading never worked so I took him on one morning before the kids were awake, a month or so ago. The previous night he'd told me I understand nothing yet again in front of the kids. F*** that. But talk to a drunk?! So I waited until morning. And let fly. Didn't say a huge amount but told him in a voice that peeled the paint off the walls that I'm not useless or stupid and unaware. I'm not the alcoholic who chews his nails all the time and then has a go at our daughter for fiddling with her hair all the time. He said how sorry he was. O, you bastard! Like hell was I going to accept that. Heard it too often before just to have it happen all over again. Enough, enough, enough! So I told him that no, he wasn't f***ing sorry. Every time he drank, he did this, made me feel so small and depressed. Every time so stop paying lip service to something he has no intention of doing. Did he know how often he got drunk? All this, without raising my voice, just filling it with all the venom and hurt and sadness and pure anger I'd kept hidden for so long. Then I left for work. He's a very smart guy and something in him struggles to be fair to everyone else so he cut back his drinking and started being affectionate toward me, etc. I think he thought I'd trust him again after just a few weeks of this. You absolute moron, don't you think after so many years of this behaviour that I'm going to trust you without months of good behaviour?! I'm not going to share a bed with you for months yet! Come on, dickhead, you've hurt me so much so many times!!! I just can't trust you anymore. But he doesn't get it. Probably doesn't even remember half the abuse he's dished out: drunks are like that. Have no idea of the magnitude of the damage they do. Ironically, my attitude will save his life because it stems his drinking and one day, 1 and a half litres of wine each night is going to kill you. So it takes me not caring for him to actually help bring on a cure. Sad that I don't have it in me anymore to love him.
No, I'm not leaving him: I'm one of those "idiots" who hangs around for the sake of the kids. Well, hey, the kids are thriving! I give myself full credit for gigantic efforts to keep our differences away from them so that they can do exactly that. Together, we're bringing up some brilliant humans who hopefully won't make such a God-almighty mess of things as we have. No, I don't regard myself as living a lie. I sleep in a different room to my husband, don't have much to say to him that isn't about the kids, most of the time these days (since the great dummy spit that morning) we're civil. I know he's suffering. He's legally blind, isolated in life to a degree but he drank ages before his eye-sight got this bad. It's not like his eyesight caused the drinking. In fact, it's likely that his drinking cause the frigging eyesight problem! So, sorry partner, but my sympathy in that regard while not quite zero, isn't high enough yet. "The quality of mercy is not strained" is not a lesson I have yet to feel an emotional connection with! So, anyone out there who has marital problems where you've really thought hard about things, defined a few rules of interaction (most simple is, if you have a drunk husband / wife, don't bother interacting with them and above all, protect the kids, protect the kids, protect the kids, then don't be like I was.
I used to just get upset and sad, never truly angry. Well, get angry and use the anger to help. Use it to have that one pivotal conversation that will wake him / her up a bit (even if only for a short while), use every ounce of energy you've got so that the anger isn't an emotional blame-fest. Use it to push you through to this amazing objectiveness I now feel. I don't feel guilty or sad, mildly regretful sometimes but totally accepting of the fact that things are screwed between us, I don't particularly want to spend the rest of my life this way but hell, my kids are worth a couple of decades of time treading water. And there are so many ways to make life bearable even under these circumstances. Set the rules, stick to them rigidly. He or she will give up eventually and you won't have the abuse. Nope, you won't get the weight loss as well! My husband actually repulses me now, he's so fat. But that feeling only came as settled opinion after the time I woke up a couple of days ago and decided I didn't care what he thought of me anymore. I cared what I thought of me. I'm not so bad. Not brilliant but at least I try to be kind (yep, folks, I try to be kind even to my self-indulgent, selfish, arrogant husband who thinks he is the most enlightened creature on this planet - o, little boy, cruel people like you are not enlightened - but I've figured out that kindness shouldn't always include letting people get away with doing wrong). So, here I am taking big deep breaths of relief, letting my persistent anger be a tool rather than something which controls me and feeling absolutely certain this won't get posted! It's just my experience, something that works for me and it's taken so long to get here: around 15 years. I've left my husband! We just share the same house, the same kids, the same bank account. Good-bye to a relationship that for many years was utterly stunning and good-bye to all the possibilities that our similarities could have given us. It's worth it to not feel so wretched any more, to get back some self-esteem (ah, sweet anger gave that back to me!).
I feel like I'm healing. I have my rules on how to handle him now. Yep, I sat down and actually wrote down how I was going to react under about 12 different scenarios. I stick to it. It works. I think this is the same as the advice of those organizations that support those of us who live with alcoholics except I came up with my own rules before this occurred to me. Proof of my lack of complete stupidity! Anyway, I want myself back. I want my energetic, internally-assured self back, like I was so long ago. So, husband, I have no use for your dragging me down any more. Funny, because according to him, I'm the drag. Well, matey, you're so bloody self-aware and understanding, figure out that I've done something, what I've done and why I've done it. I'm not too sure you even realize the tiniest proportion of this. You think I'm a total idiot. Hold on to that thought if you want. You're wrong. But I don't care if you want to think that of me, that's how far I've moved away from you. One day, even the anger will go and I guess that will mean I've permanently left you. Well, I haven't really told all the things he said to me, the snide remarks, the glances, the public scenes, the humiliation. Whatever. That's how I chose to tell it.
I am angry at my husband of 16 years. I am a hard working women 40-56 hours a week , have two children and they are involved in afterschool activities that I take them to ,I am going to school 2 nights week. My husband calls me lazy and says I do not help him like I used too , but he is never in the position of needing anything he has a clean home, clean clothes , food on the table and works as late as he feels a need to and most of the time nothing is said. He verbally abuses me very often. I try to avoid this but any little thing sets him off. I hate that I let my guard down ( because I do love him ) and let him have sex with me. Then the next day the cycle starts all over again. I feel so stupid and sometimes feel like I'm his whore, I know that I should not make love to him but I do want things to work out, I want to be loved . I know that I deserve more then this. I sometimes go into depression and cry very often I hate that I can not be the strong person I know I should be . I want to leave not only for myself but for my children , It hurts me so to see them fear their father. I am setting myself up so that someday soon I can leave until then I tell myself he is not home that often and I can live this way a little while longer. I am not only angry at him I am angry at myself because I have always said that I would not live this way. Thanks for letting me vent.
I am so angry at my husband because he has been drinking a lot lately and now that I'm working and HE'S in school (before it was the other way) he has a LOT of spare time which he spends drinking with the neighbor. (Who is by the way a very nice man but whose own wife won't let him in the house because HE drinks too much). Well, hubby took something I said out of context. He said his drinking wasn't a problem because he only does it a few times a week. I SAID that what if I did something he really hated, like find a boyfriend, and did it ONLY A FEW TIMES WEEK, how would he like that? He HEARD "I'M a whore who is cheating on you several times a week." SO now he's mad at ME for "cheating" on him. Yes, with my full time job and two kids and work that I bring home on top of that. When do I have time to cheat? When I'm in the bathroom taking a shit? Or perhaps when I'm behind the curtain in the laundry room? Bastard! So being an alcoholic, of course he blames ME for drinking. He wouldn't dring so much if I wouldn't bitch so much. What? And now we have a new house and a BRAND NEW FIST HOLE in the door to go with the ones in EVERY OTHER HOUSE WE'VE EVER LIVED IN!!!! He's sleeping in the truck over at the neighbors. I am so angry!!! HE acted like this and said these things IN FRONT OF OUR TWO GIRLS!!! THey were crying and begging him to stop drinking and he told them to TELL ME to STOP making him so upset. CLASSIC! not even an original asshole, he had to borrow the line from The Addicts Handbook of Codependent Phrases. But I'm not buying it. I think it's over. And I'm crying.
Belittles me all the time. To my family, his family, his work partner & to my face. Everything I do & say is wrong. The stories he tells people about me are all lies. My family know they are lies; other ppl don't though. He's an insecure, control freak & sometimes I hate him so much I wish I'd never met him.
He treats work round the house on a sliding scale of who earns the most - him, so while I work fulltime too, because I don't earn as much as him, I'm the house slave. Is he grateful? Is he f***. Nothing I do in the house is ever good enough for him either.
He's an A-hole & I hate him!!!
He spends money on games online, so he can "buy "cool gear"...real money, on fake "gear"? WHAT THE HELL. He's cheating on me, althogh of course I can't prove it. He never ever cleans, or cooks, and when he brings food home, he bitches that I should be able to go a full day without eating, and then he bitches at the fact that I'm so damn skinny. I put a fridge on layaway so we wouldnt be buying microwaveable food every single damn day, and he has yet to go pick it up (thats about $100 down the drain)so it is now sold to someone else, and i cant get my deposite back. His parents drive us back and forth to work, because our car isn't fixed, because he's too lazy to get it done when I PAYED FOR ALL THE PARTS. He's constantly doing shit that hurts, and then he looks at me like im stupid and says "quit being so wimpy" WHEN I FUCKING SAY OW, I MEAN OW DAMNIT. It's okay to critisize me, and my family, but the moment you even joke about him or his family, it's war! My best friend told me they love me, and want to be with me, but I cant leave this asshole, because I don't have proof for any of it! He lies to everyone about me, including his mom, everything that happens to him is my fault one way or another. It's our turn to buy cigs (we split with his rents) and I don't have any money because of his damn game and cell phone bill, and i have to tell his mom i didnt get any money from him because he was almost late for work, because when I woke him up, he didn't get up, so it was my fault (asshole), so now I get to pay them back for gas, and cigaretts, because he won't....GAH I AM SO SICK OF THIS SHIT, CAN I HAVE A DO-OVER PLEASE?!
It's almost 17 years and I am so sick of this jerk who had the nerve to tell me about eating too much when I'm pregnant (doctor says my weight is fine) when I was fixing half a cheese sandwich. He has a 23 year old daughter who is a real porker and who will probably need Liz Taylor's bedsheets to make a wedding gown. So why doesn't he tell her she is fat? Why does he yell and disrespect me and treat her and his mother like a pair of queens? I am so sick of this man. He has turned my 16 year old son against me and he is setting a bad example as a man for him. Anything to ask of this man he acts like I'm putting him out even when it is to walk the dogs by the lake. he should have stayed with that ex wife of his years ago since he cannot break from his old in-laws and spends more time talking to his former brother-in-law than he does to me or anyone in my family. I had been nothing but nice to them, but they are rude and hateful because I am tall, educated, and slim and they are short stumpy people who never made it out of high school. If his mother wants to see this child after it is born, she is going to have to come to my house to respect me. None of this toting the child over to her like a burnt offering to Baal, and to good to get off her duff and make an effort. Those good days are over. I'm splitting our checking account to my own so I can make plans to leave. Let him have the house it isn't worth it if only to get peace. I tell him to leave and he says you get out. I have worked hard for years and this is my payment. To be treated like shit and ignored. It is so hard to get through the workday feeling like this and not wanting to go home. I wish I never met this bastard. I wish he would go live with another woman. I really would not give a shit. All I need are my kids and quiet.
There he goes again in one of his dumbass tempers that come from nowhere. He'd been telling me about his family's latest adventures. They are all white trash. Once he tells me, he goes into one of his black moods where he's shouting and screaming and finding fault with everything I do.
It's not my fault you're descended from white trash & your family live like dung beetles. You think you're a cut above them. Have I got news for you. You behave like a total c**t. You're worse than them cos you think you're something better. Asshole. I hate you.
I don't see my husband much. He works 40 plus hours a week and
is only home Sunday all day and is only home Monday night. I look forward to
seeing him on Sundays and Hope we can all do something as a "family"
Lately he has just been complaining about everything, from the mess, to the kids, his privacy, ect ect We can't go anywhere or do anything because something else needs to be done at home.
I am a very clean person but sometimes we have other kids watch tv in our room and make a mess or play downstairs in the play room and I dont get to it in time. So I have to hear it from HIM. He gives me advice-- I dont want to hear. Every word out of his mouth is bitchy. He doesnt play with the children. He doesnt ever want to have sex
I never see him He lost his high paying job now we dont make
that much money anymore He insults me and says he is just kidding He sniffs too
much like he has a problem with his nose and wont fix it Sometimes I think he is
gay I love him but at the same time I hate him.
*Note from Anger Central
Your husband is going through a classic case of stress. He's looking for some kind of stability right now. He's worried he can't provide for his family. We know because the Webmaster has gone through this himself. You are now at one of the "For worse" points mentioned in your marriage vows. This is the time to remember that you are partners in life. Try to avoid fights. Try to find a way to get as much stress out of his life as you can. We hope you both pull it out and have a long contented and happy life together.
Please keep in mind there are two sides to every story so let's start with his side - according to him i am a cold frigid bitch who has not allowed him to sleep in our bedroom in over 2 years...
and now allow me to explain why i have in fact been a cold frigid bitch who doesn't want him anywhere near my bed and hasn't for more than 2 years.
i would say the resentment started while i was pregnant with our precious angel baby boy who is now 2 years old. i was very sick while i was pregnant, it was a high risk pregnancy and my doctor advised i go to part time at work if not quitting all together... at any time i could have had a stroke or seizures and at one point during the pregnancy spent a few weeks in icu...
but did my husband bother getting a job so i could follow doctors orders and he could provide for his wife and child like a real man would do? of course not! he sat on his lazy ass drinking until he passed out playing xbox live watching me leave for work every day so damn sick and miserable i would cry when i had to get out of bed but i had to work because i was pregnant and had to have the health insurance and it's not like being a consumer of xbox live provides health care benefits...
i ended up having seizures and almost having a stroke when i was almost 34 weeks pregnant, so they had to do an emergency c section so i could have the cardiac care i needed as well as a blood transfusion... i almost died. my baby was a preemie (he is healthy and happy now, all blessings and thanks to God) anyhow, did any of this prompt this alcoholic p.o.s. to do anything other than drink himself into oblivion and play xbox while i returned to work 6 weeks after this traumatic experience again pretty much against doctors orders? of course not!
in fact, while i was in the cardiac unit after the c section getting my blood transfused, he was sneaking off to the car in the parking garage drinking! like he really thought no one could smell it on him when he came back in smelling like a whino... i was so humiliated because i know the doctors and nurses smelled it too because they started treating me with pity after that. i was in the hospital quite a while, of course my baby was in the nicu but like i said he came out of everything fine and is totally healthy now...
anyhow so life goes on afterward i recover our angel baby boy is growing and i am working and asshole is still holding the couch down playing xbox live daily while i continue working, paying all the bills, etc. and yet he can't understand why i hate his guts and don't want to have sex with him.
well, i had another surgery about 4 months ago, more blood transfusions, blah blah blah and he pretty much continues his same drunken bull crap and didn't even bother coming to the hospital when i almost died from complications of surgery, my teenage daughter never left my side for 4 days while i was in a pretty much coma, for some reason i wouldn't wake up from the anesthesia... but my so called loving husband is nowhere to be found, and my mom had my angel baby boy...
so once i recovered a bit from surgery i finally felt physically strong enough to kick his ass out of here... he is gone... i am having a very hard time paying the bills, he is not bothering to visit our precious baby boy, he has been gone 3 months and has given me a grand total of 45.00 and a bag of diapers... but i am happy! i encourage anyone living with an alcoholic to get away from them asap. they can only drag you down. unless of course you're a drunk too, in which case i don't reckon you'd care.
now after being separated less than 2 months he is seeing someone else and would appreciate if i could not call him because it upsets her! omg, i can't even tell you how much that upsets me. not that he has a girlfriend, i don't care about that, but that he told me not to call him to see if he wanted to see his baby who we are lucky to have because it upsets her! omg, the nerve he has. i can't wait until our divorce is final.
so yes, i have been a cold frigid bitch to this asshole, but i think i have valid reasons.
If I start, I shall never stop. I just him to use some consideration and respect when driving. He uses his knee to steer the vehicle. We have had this discussion for thirty years, he continues to do it and says it is not deliberate. Well let me say this! If he doesn't want salt on his food and for thirty years I continue to put salt on that food, can I claim it's not deliberate? Thus the workings of a fool's mind!
In the interests of fairness, justice, etc I will refrain from name calling, personal attacks, etc, and stick to facts.
Exhibit A: I am in the military and gearing up to go out west for a three month period of active duty. All I hear is, "I'm sick of you going on and on about your fucking orders, you KNOW it bothers me and thanks for ruining my birthday."
EXHIBIT B: During this period, I go to next door Nevada to go visit my pop, who I hadn't seen in 3-4 years. Naturally, guess who has a cow... I had $500 in the joint account, which being in a casino I was very good about NOT touching. Until I turn around and there's exactly $2.50 in there. He thought he was going to leave me stranded with no way to get back to base. Had I not gambled with only fives and tens and left my $20's alone, not worked on my aunt's car, etc. I definitely would have been SCREWED.
EXHIBIT C: During the same trip, he was giving me SUCH a hard time, that my father literally confiscated my phone. I think he just got sick of listening to the bitching. Guess who contacted the police to find out which hotel I was staying in??? You guessed it... the husband.
EXHIBIT D: Left me literally HUNDREDS of phone messages. "I'm going to burn your stuff." "Get your crap out of my house now" (MY house??? HAHHAHAHAHAHAHA, wrong... its MY signature ALONE on the lease) "I'm done, get a good attorney" (I'll get RIGHT ON IT!!!) It's gotten to the point where I just skim through them, not really bother to listen to the content, and save the really good ones for if and when I do get an attorney.
EXHIBIT X; I know I skipped some letters, but I am getting tired. He insists on having me talk to him ALL THE TIME. You can't just be completely mean and then expect me to reciprocate when you're in the mood. Also I am not big on rotting in my barracks. Sometimes I have to go somewhere.
Exhibit Y: "Your damn friends are more important." What friends I had been hanging out with have all deployed to Afghanistan. Oh the same ones he expressly mentioned he hoped they came home, in a box. >:( This, I have no intention to forgive.
Exhibit Z: I have barely absorbed the material covered in this three month class. Barely hung on to my outer veneer of military bearing and discipline. And will barely restrain myself from smashing him in the damn face with the heaviest object I can swing when I see him upon returning home. Because I have three months of nothing but pent-up rage for the ruthless, cruel and obscenely and patently ridiculous abuse you have heaped upon me. Bastard. (Oops... as to the name calling thing, looks like I lied, yet again!)
*Note from Anger Central
1) First, Anger Central thanks you for your service to our nation and for protecting our worthless butts.
2) We're going to write about this on the main page, but Mrs. Webmaster is about to deploy to China for 3 months. Her mother is very ill. This is unexpected, but the Webmaster is doing all he can to help her.
3) We hate to say it, but this husband of yours doesn't deserve a great person such as yourself. Normally we like to try and help save a marriage, but from your descriptions, this one may be lost. We hope we are wrong, but it sounds like all your husband cares about is himself. He's forgotten that Marriage is a partnership and sometimes things don't go the way you all want them to go. :(
4) We hope all your friends now deployed come home safe and sound. Please thank them for us here at Anger Central
I am angry at my husband. He needed a credit card to carry with him for emergency. In one year, he earned $32000 in salary and charged $40000 on MY credit cards. He charged liquor, cigarettes, and gasoline on a daily basis. I am so stupid.
My husband is the biggest shithead there is alive. After 3years of marriage he's cheating on me with at least 5 women (found all sms while the jerk was sleeping) we havn't had sex in over a year now I know why.He needs the practice cause he's the worse lover I've ever had. The sight and everything about him makes me want to hurl. I really really hate this man from the bottom of my heart.
My husband is the freakin UGLIEST NASTIEST PIECE OF FUCKING NO GOOD SHIT I've ever met. He's an alcoholic, a world class LOSER, and the most unmotivated human being I've ever met. His naked body repulses me to the point of dry heaving. I'm not kidding. No, it wasn't always this way! But it sure is now. He makes NO MONEY, he hates my kids, he hates his life, and I pick up the freakin' tab for his failures. He also shits at least 7 times a day because he eats so much food. Our grocery bill is sinking us. I want him to not be alive anymore.
mmmm let me see. i'm damn angry cause i am sick and tired of my asshole husband of 6 years always putting me down when we are hanging around other people its as if he tries to out do me by putting me down. fuck that he is not even good in bed. i think i lost my sex drive cause he is just not doing it for me. i feel like i am in high school competing with my rival instead of him being my husband. what the fuck cant he just be my husband why does he feel great when he puts me down or jokes about me ahahahhhhhhhh why because he is a fucking immature asshole. that's why . why us women have to be the mature ones. because we really have the balls to be the ones to deal with everything. ok what the hell you work and you are stronger than me and what does that mean. that does not give you the right to put me down when im playing with you when we are in a group of friends and family. you don't think that i want to hang out with friends and BS and party. i wish but i have a brain and know that i have responsibilities now. WHY CANT YOU.
I found out tonight that he is a member of a dating site! Of course he denied it, but I saw it with my own two eyes, a picture of him and a profile with our kids names on it!!
For a long time now he's been getting these messages from other dating sites but he's been claiming it was spam and I could not disprove him because I would get them too, even though I am not a member of any dating site, but this time, he can not make that same claim because it is part of one of those social network groups and you have to join in individually.
That picture of him on his profile was one I had never seen before either so I looked on his cell phone and there it was! His profile said he was looking for woman and that his kids lived with him and his marital status was unknown! And you know what?? He tells me all the time he loves me, how fucked up is that!!!
And here it was I thought we had a good marriage!
Well, to soothe myself, I changed his search from woman to man, LOL. I doubt it took though cause it asked for his password and I don't have that.
It really pisses me off that he's done this to me, I don't deserve this!! I've been a good and faithful wife to him all these years and this is the thanks I get?? I've had to put up with his shit all these years and he's looking to replace me??! Who the hell does he think he is!!
HE had better watch it,I may be older now but I still turn heads!!!
I am so hurt my husbands mother is an alcoholic we have been together 3 years and have twins since i have given up my career to be a good mum and wife. however i dink a bottle of wine a night it never affects us i potter about the house cleaning etc while he watched tv. he beat me to a pulp in march and i begged him to come back saying it was all my fault cos i was drunk the reality is he beat me and constantly says it was my fault. even tought i chill out with a bottle of wine i still raise the kids pander to his every whim, though he continuously tells me he regrets ever meeting me he is unhappy with life wants to leave but the next day says he loved me so much is happy with our family etc i still love him he has walled out and i feel lost without him i want to die i have nothing left to give
*Note from Anger Central
Ma'am, you are in serious danger, both you and your children. If your husband hit you he is a criminal. You need to seek help NOW. As to the bottle of wine that "doesn't affect you" yes it does. You're just not able to judge this. A word of advice. Do not drink any alcohol for 30 days. If you don't feel any urge or need to drink, then you should be ok. If you can't make it through a month, or feel that "You have to have just a glass to get through the day", you have a problem. For the sake of your children, please seek help NOW! We don't want to read another news story of a woman beaten near to death by an abusive husband. You must seek help.
This is the second time in the history of Anger Central where we have seen this type of problem and strongly recommended the poster leave as fast as her feet can carry her. Please, find someone who can advise and assist you.
I meet my husband 7 years ago I thought I had the perfect guy. We got married and started finding e-mails of other women. I confronted him and he said there was nothing there he would stop. We had a baby with the help of IVF because HE has a problem and cant have kids naturally, and he is never home his hobbies and work comes first. He never has nothing good to say about me. According to him I am home all day doing nothing. I cook, clean and take care of the baby. He does not buy me gifts for my b-day I dont anything right. So who is the idiot if not me for staying in a relationship like this...
*Note from Anger Central
Pass this on to your husband for us.
Dear Jackass. Whatever gave you the idea that your wants and needs come before those of your wife and child? Why don't you get your selfish, spoiled head out of your ass and treat your wife they way she should be treated? With love and respect! The Angry Webmaster's wife is in China right now helping her mother who is gravely ill. He misses her terribly and is in the process of looking for "Just the right gift" to give her when she gets back just before Christmas. Stop behaving like something a cow left behind in a field and start acting like a husband and father...Moron!
i'm getting my master's and he's still working on his damn bachelor's. he blames me for him flunking out the first time. he is a loser and he will never find a job. all he does is watch anime all the time never thinks to help clean up after I've worked 12 hr shifts or had classes all day. he's unattractive with his shaggy hair i absolutely loath him and we've been married a little over a year!
Our two year old son had a temp of 102 he was pretty sick for about a day and then just had the sniffles, but in those days he was sick my two year old got alot of attention. Now EVERY FREAKING DAY since our son was sick my husband has been checking his own temp and every day comes up with a new symptom for himself. Today almost a week later he tells me he thinks he needs his tonsils taken out! WTF is WRONG with this jackass!!
I have stood by this man. and I mean stood after a 19 yr old( hes 30) and a married woman, jail time, the loss of his son(cause he hates him and doeant want to see him) yet dailly i;m told I cant do any thing right. and GOD forbid I ask him to do something with his family cause he has things to do. Llike his friends or getting trashed every day. I take out the trash, mow the yard, work a fulll time job, and he wjont even kiss me. But heres the kicker if I want something I have to beg. He thinks i;m aloser and yet his mommy pays his bills and he tells me some day he might have time for me. I am th e stupid one cause I have stayed, love only bends so far then that shit breaks and all thats left is hate or worse empytiness.
dirty lazy husband is a liar, cheat, womanizer fake, drinks and every rotten thing there is. I had been married to this piece of shit for 28 years.. he wasn't like that in the beginning, i guess he was faking it. he never could hold a job, always gets laid off, bad luck follows him like glue. when he lost his job of l4 years in 2006 he really changed into a piece of shit,, not caring about a damn thing...i had enough of his shit... a word to you young women...don't wait around with your crappy husbands, don't waste your life and your time, when you possibly could have a better life with someone else or your better off alone then to have shit everyday. I should have left this bastard a long time ago...
I've been married to the mean self centered, uncompassionate, inconsiderate, mean, withholding, discounting man for over 30 years. It started right after we were married. I cried so much in the beginning and wanted out. Then got pregnant and the ass made me walk home 2 miles at 8 months PG. Then he yelled at where we lived, wanted to move in with his mommy, and wanted me to take care of his 4 lazy brothers. I refused. Had 2 more kids with him, thinking he'd change, but ordered me around, demanded dinner on time, asked what I did all day with 3 kids, yelled when he got home from work, came out running after us in his underwear from bed if anyone made a noise, and never did anything good for me unless it had something in it for himself. Jerk, idiot. Turns lights out when I'm standing there talking, walks out of the room in the middle of my sentence, Rude AHole..then when I confront him, he blame everything on me. I can't finsish one sentence without him cutting in and twisting things and falsely accusing me. He finds my friends to buddy up to, and tells them lies about me, and their stupid enough to believe him.
He won't allow me to talk unless it's about him, or positive. He never laughs, or smiles or plays it's so damn frickin boring living with him. Always so serious and makes himself constantly busy, which never includes me. Doesn't appreciate his wife, never has, never will. I want out! I've had enough. He is a narcissist self centered creep who doesn't give a crap about me at all. I hate how he treats me, its sick! He's out dancing with other women too, I hate it, but it's ok because he likes it. I say it's wrong, it hurts our marriage, he denies it and continues it. I think he had or still has something going on with one of his dance lady partners. He lies a lot. Withhold all affection. There's no intimacy. He punishes me by no sex. Ass! I'm hanging on, saving money so I can get the H..away from the mommy's boy baby. Hope he goes home to her, she never supports me anyway, just makes excuses for him. What a crap life I've had with him. Loved my children, and good memories there, but not with him..he always ignored me...then turned them against me when they got older. They are coming back now. He sucks. In hospital before surgery he leaves. During my son's surgery, he leaves to go to religious speaker. Idiot....after surgeon told us to stay in waiting room...he leaves. I don't want to grow old with him, he won't take care of me. He's like a 2 year old in mentality, and he's mentally cruel and demeaning. Can't stand him. There!!
My husband is controlling and physically abusive. He was hitting and choking my 15 year old son in the driveway and throwing him up against the garage wall and was stupid enough to deliver his speech on child discipline to a policeman. Now he is in jail and has screwed up our family. He will not listen to me or anyone else to tell him that he is a poor parent.
I am so sick and fucking tired of my husband. He doesn't appreciate a damn thing that I do, have done, put up with and continue to put up with. We have 3 kids together and he's got 2 from a previous marriage. I'm raising them all and him too. He doesn't do a damn thing around the house and yet bitches after I get it clean, saying that he's surprised the house is clean. Today he came to me and said he wants a divorce. Seriously? At this point, I could care less. I'm tired of putting up with his verbal abuse, his sexual needs (when he refuses to put forth any effort on his part) and blame me for not getting any, and I'm just plain-ass tired of being the damn housebitch.
I've been with my husband since we met at 18 years old. We are 45 now. Our child is full grown and out of the home.
My problem is: he's always had a bad attitude, temper, etc.... He's never hit me... but...
After years of being treated like shit I gained a lot of weight. I decided 10 years ago to start losing the weight when I hit rock bottom and hated life so much I wanted to die.
I started walking at 284lbs. I walked everyday and then started a 30 minute workout video. I graduated to a real gym. A great small gym... I was down from a size 22 to a size 14 when I walked into the gym...thinking I was the fattest women ever..at a size 14. LOL
I worked out with my trainer 6 days a week. Two hours a day. I still walked 4 miles a day in the evening.
I started boxing Wednesday nights and Saturday mornings.
After 1 year at the gym I went from a size 14 to a size 10 but weighed exactly the same.
This is when my trouble started. My husband seemed to be angry all the time. He could not speak to me without talking through his teeth.
I continued to get stronger and healthier. I was starting my days workouts with 80 flights of stairs on the stairclimber in 15 minutes before my regular exercises. I was benching nearly 200lbs. And.. was a little muscle.
I went from a 10 to a size 6. I looked great but had a lot of extra skin on my tummy. Between having a baby years earlier and getting so fat. I had a $12,500 surgery to repair what years of unhappiness had done.
As time went by the 24/7 verbal abuse continued. I was being screamed out of sounded sleeps to move my F'n car, etc. I did nothing wrong. I went to the gym, followed by work.. followed by cooking dinner and cleaning my house. He was turning into a MONSTER. To the point I feared he was poison me. I know that sounds strange but when someone is that angry with you, you can put nothing past them. He was going insane.
He tore the door off our home because he said I gave him a look. He'd throw the remote control for the tv if I asked what was on. He'd scream so much, spit would fly out of his mouth. At 5ft 10 1/2 and 350lbs (pipe fitter) so he's not weak........ was a scary scary man.
He would slam me out of his way with his forearm just because I asked him to take out the trash and screaming at me the entire time.
I lived this life for 5 years. Needless to say. He finally got on meds for a few years. Didn't really fix him. The entire thing gave me a nerves breakdown. I went on depression and anxiety medicine because of it. Trust me... no one can be screamed at 24/7 and looked at like the most hated person on earth with out having a breakdown.
Over the past 3.5 years I've not been to the gym - I've gained 130 plus pounds. I'm wearing size 24. Bigger than ever. And.......... he's stopped yelling.
I hate being unhealthy and on high blood pressure and anxiety medicine.
I am angry because I feel like his jealousy turned into anger that transformed into an anger rage disorder. The dr.'s have also said he is a border-line personality disorder.
But....I still think it is not fair that I spent 5.5 years of my life working hard everyday to get healthy only for him to spend the same amount of time trying to destroy me.
I guess I can say he's won............. I am defeated.
However, what's changed is my feelings about him. I hate when he tries to touch me. I avoid sexual contact with me as much as humanly possible. I tighten up so tight inside just at the touch from him.
I've never left........because I have no where else to go.. my parents are gone. No family. I have a daughter but I could never impose on her like that. I made my bed...as they say. I choose him. I try and make it work as best as I can. To be honest I dream of a day when he's is gone and I can seek out counseling and a good trainer so I can be healthy again and get off the high blood pressure meds. As you can imagine.... it's very hard to lose weight and I put my heart and soul, sweat and tears into losing that weight. I can't imagine putting all that effort in again.. not with him still in my life.
Why couldn't he just be happy for me? Why wouldn't he walk and workout with me? I wanted him too.
If it wasn't jealousy, then what was it? He's not on medicine now and he's not treating me that way?
I know I'm a strong person to have lived through this. But I am no match for him. He can and did destroy me...
So yes, I'm angry!!!!
I have read so many stories on here and I feel it is such a shame that there are awesome women out there who have so much going for them and they still keep them asshole husbands. Including ME!
I am getting rid of mine. I have rented a house and when he goes out for his regular weekend bender, I am moving out all of my stuff and moving to a new town. I have hired a lawyer to serve him after I have moved out with full custody papers and child support order.
I am sick and tired of the sleeping on the couch, drinking every f***ing weekend until he can't even see anymore. Drinking and driving, waking up the kids in the middle of the night because he's so loud. Spending all his money and me having to cover his portion of the house and food and everything bills. Well, it is HIGH TIME that he grow up and take care of himself. And I feel sorry for the next sorry lady to like him cause' he'll heave her cooking and cleaning and doing everything in no time flat. Then she can deal with him for the next 10 years until she feels like if she has to put up with this for 1 more freaking minute she is going to drive her car off a freaking mountain!!
I am moving out and I am never going back. I will ask for references, credit reports, drivers abstract and blood tests before I ever live with or marry another man.
Be smart ladies, if they are mostly assholes than they are good people, then leave them!!!
I should have known why this jerk was single.
I married the biggest jerk that lied about having only one child until after we were married two years ago only to find out that he has a now three year old child and we have been together for 5 years, no only that but now since we are married it seems that I buy everything for his children while the mother of his first child's mother does nothing but sit on her ass and create more debt for good tax paying Americans, what a jerk! i have told him many times that I want a divorce, but he won't sign the papers or leave me alone. Such the asshole since has cheated once I wish he would go cheat again and this time stay with the lucky fool that he cheats with. That would make me so happy. I wish I would have never married this dumb, cheating asshole
My husband is really ticking me off..hes been pissy ever since I bought a house in the country and I got two jobs,going to school taking care of the kids and paying all the bills! All he does is mope around and cut me down saying that I want to be in charge of everything..Well Hell..he needs to get off his ass and figure it out..WAKE UP!!! Im a mom of course Im in charge..He started drinking more and yelling at my five year old!! HELL NO!! sometimes I think I would be better without him. Even his family wont talk to him..they call me..well duh wake up call
My husband is a self centered arrogant asshole because every action he takes, every word of bullshit that comes out of his mouth, and every contrived good deed that he does is driven by his out of control, ridiculously inflated ego. This guy is sooo stuck on himself that anytime I have a conversation with him about something going on in MY life, he can only listen for about a half a second before turning the conversation subject to HIS life and how it's all about him! He also never takes me out on a date. Before we got married he basically pretended to like going out to dinner and movies just to trap me into marrying him only to become a completely boring person who doesn't have a life. Further he has this fake persona that he puts on for anyone outside of our family. He can be yelling and acting like a complete asshole one minute, and as soon as the doorbell or phone rings he becomes Mr. Sweet as PIE ASSHOLE! Course everyone thinks he's so nice, but they have no idea what he's really like. Finally, he has this annoying habit of frantically helping people in the most patronizing way possible. He likes to play up how generous and helpful he is, but he makes it so complicated and stupid and time consuming even for the person he is helping that eventually most people that are receiving this "help" of his don't want to have anything more to do with him. Finally, I'm angry because I've made every attempt to communicate my unhappiness and what specific things he could do to be a good husband, but he has chosen to do nothing to help...so - that's when I decided to cut him off in every way. I hate my marriage and I pray that he will have to go far away for a job or something,,anything to get him out of my house until my kids are grown up and I can divorce him and get back to a single and happy existance where I don't have to filter so much of his noise, clutter, and ego driven confusion and bullshit!
Before I start, let me say, after reading a lot of the "husband rants", I am grateful that he is not an alcoholic, druggie, cheater or physical abuser! And I'm also grateful that we have no children to complicate things!
But he's immature and lazy; where is the nice funny guy that I fell in love with? The stuff that was cute and funny is now annoying and childish.
I work 40+ hours a week; he works 2-3 days a week (and less than 8 hrs a day at that) at a fast-food joint. I suppose I should be grateful that he even has a job. You would think that this would give him time to do stuff around the house; you'd be wrong! He will NOT do anything he's asked to do unless I've pretty much screamed it into an argument (which then of course makes me the nagging bitch). When he does finally do it, it's half-assed (he "washes" the dishes and lo and behold, I find dishes in the cupboard with food still stuck to them...) OMFG WTF BBQ really?
But he can spend 12 hours with his friends every Saturday playing games and can sit up all night every night playing computer games! Now granted, I do play the same computer game (it's the one bit of fun in my life), but he'd rather play with another guild (group of people) in the game than play with me. He ignores me when I just want a little attention, then gets pissy when I get upset about it.
We never go anywhere or do anything (can't really afford it, but still, there are free things to do). Sex? Yeah, we have it, it's not bad, actually. But I don't know why he wants it from me. I'm fat and feel unattractive. Not to mention he has put on some weight too (not much, but he won't do anything about it) & doesn't brush his teeth without being nagged.
We don't fight a lot, only when I get fed up and finally scream at him for everything that he's done to piss me off. Then he sits there and plays his game or watches TV and won't listen or answer me. Tonight was a fine example - I asked why he won't do the few simple things I ask him to do, etc. Do you know what he said? "Because you're a bad person and I hate you." Then why the FUCK are you still here, seriously?! (Oh, because no one else would have your stupid ass, that's right!) I'm really not sure if he actually meant that (he usually doesn't go that far when we fight), but sometimes I think he likes to see me upset. He must or else why would he do it?
So here I am in tears, pouring my heart out to strangers on the Internet. I guess I could get a divorce, but I am really scared to be alone. I would much rather have my funny, loving husband back - I miss him. :(
well..coz my hubby of 3 years is a dumb f***, an unsanity a**, and he is clumsy, broke, poor in ettiquette, fat, bald and alcoholic. He didn't keep the house so filthy before we married, but that is because we did not live together so everytime I was skedded to visit he had a cleaning woman make the place spiffy (which I didn't know back then) and I got so impressed with his "cleanliness"! yeah right...check him out now...it is pretty doggon unbelievable!
He was thinner when we were dating. I do not like short men, but he was thin so he looked ok...not handsome or anything but ok enough, plus he seemed nice. So I "settled" for this short bald headed guy who is now so fat and round and uglier by the second that i cannot believe I am actually married to this guy.
I also didn't know (when we were dating) that he was 100,000 in debt and that he is really bad at handling money. he doesn't pay his bills and they stack up at his house. he squanders his money at the bar every night until there is nothing left to pay our bills.
now that he is getting panic attacks, due to being laid off from his job, and is on medication we do not ever have sex. he says the meds make his dick not able to stand up.
help!! what kind of marriage is this. i could go on more coz i am mad ta him of course but i am more mad at me!!! how stupid!! i seems i am a bad decision-maker, right?
I have been married to this man going on 23 years. Early on he would have this roller coaster pattern of unreasonable anger fits about once a week. I finally figured out he was drinking on the sly. Then he admitted to the drinking and it was even worse, but of course he does not have an alcohol problem because he thinks he can control it and it is his legal right to drink. He could go (when he chooses) maybe a few months without drinking, but this is always temporary just to prove he is in control and then he will drink enough over the next few days to more than make up for all the time he went without. At first I blamed the alcohol for his anger fits, and thought if I would do things better he would relax and settle down but nothing I could do would please him. He was very verbally abusive and controlling, then there would be physical abuse, just small things, hard to pin down - like he would through a cup across the room and always manage to hit me though he insisted he didn't mean to. He wanted children but the first time I got pregnant I miscarried at 6 weeks and he was so mad, he would not let me go to the doctor right away. Then he blamed me and my wierd family for not producing him children. He was in the National Guard and served in Desert Storm. When he returned I finally got pregnant again. Probably would not have happened otherwise as his theory was it was my responsibility to figure out down to the minute when I was ovulating and have sex one time and be done with it - if I didn't get pregnant it was my fault for figuring wrong. He would not cooperate other times unless he wanted sex. Well then after I was pregnant his drinking got a lot worse. He is compulsive and if he buys a bottle he has to drink ALL of it in one sitting, not matter how big or how strong it is. He was going through a litre of brandy or whiskey every couple days. Then he got mad for some dome reason, came home, threw me on the floor and beat and kicked me. I could only curl up in a ball to try and keep him from kicking my stomach which he was clearly trying to do, I was 4 1/2 mos pregnant. Then he took my keys, and my unemployment check, and flushed my wedding ring down the toilet and threw me out of his dinky apartment. Which was one in which children were not even allowed but when I got pregnant he refused to get anything else. So I went to a shelter for awhile and then to my parents. I tried to go through the church to make him get counseling but this just made him angry, he would not cooperate, but I refused to move back with him till after the baby was born. I saved all my money and bought a used mobile home. He begged and begged to move back with me, he would change, he was good with the baby and would help with bills which I needed, so I made the mistake of letting him back and of course he went back to drinking. Then his work pattern became more and more evident - he would never stay with a job, always quit after a short time, and the few jobs he didn't quit he would be fired because he was hopelessly rude and unable to get along with people. He would promise to pay for some thing we and then invariably get mad at me for some moronic reason and at the last minute change his mind or withhold the money. He could not be responsible to pay bills so it all fell on me, and then I would have to find the money to pay them as well since he could not be depended on. Sometimes he would give me money but it was never enough, and all the months in between he never paid for rent or utilities or food I was just supposed to absorb it and not complain, and if I called him deadbeat or lazy he would be furious. Eventually he tried to punch or kick me, and since I wasn't bleeding or missing teeth he insisted I was not hurt and it was wrong of me to complain about a black eye or bruise - I deserved it. And because I wasn't going to put up with that and called the police, that made him furious, I had done an unpardonable thing. He moved into the living room and refused to sleep with me anymore, and if he tried to hit or kick me, he'd be careful to do it where the bruises would not show so I had no evidence, and I learned the hard way, the police could not help me unless I had real evidence that he was hurting me. Even if he smashed property in the house, it was his house (although technically it was mine, his name is not on it and he never paid a dime for this dump of a mobile home) and he had a right to smash things if he felt like it, so that was no proof. The one time I could have had evidence, it was blizzarding, he yanked the phone out of the wall and threw it in the toilet so I could not call, and I couldn't get out of the house with my little girl and would not leave without her. He left the print of his combat boot on my back, but made sure to keep me prisoner with no phone until it was fading and I had no proof and then he insists to this day I made the whole story up, he never did that. Finally one time I had enough evidence, he threw me on the floor and kicked me repeatedly in front of our then 5 yr old daughter. I had a black eye and a few visible bruises, and so he went to jail and I got a restraining order, and he was required to go to Anger Management. What a joke! That just made him really angry and eventually he had to come back. Because, naturally he can turn on the charm when he wants, and he has a natural gift of persuasion he rarely uses for a good cause, but he can make almost anyone do what he wants, and he of course convinces himself that his own bizarre actions are notmal and justified. He appealed the restraining order to get visitation of his daughter and made me go to court. Then proceed to wrap the judge around his little finger, convincing him that I was just an hysterical woman who had completely overreated to the situation, and the judge would not allow me even one word to explain my side. Instead, he orders me to modify the restraining order by corresponding with my husband and work things out and get back together. My husband did stop the physical abuse, but the verbal, emotional, mental and financial abuse continued all the more. Because I had done an unforgiveable thing by calling the police and he was never the least bit sorry for what he did to me. I realized then there was no escaping him as long as our daughter was a minor. He is a vindictive sort who would manipulate and use the legal system to the limit to make our lives hell if I tried to get away, and because of his unnatural power of persuasion, the courts would always be on his side. Not to mention he threatened to kill us both if I ever left, or if he ever had to pay child support. So, maybe I should have left anyway, but I did not see a way to do it, and it would take all my pay just to survive and struggle month to month to pay the bills because either he would not be working and even when he did, would only contribute randomly and it was never enough. So I ended up in deep credit card debt and eventually had to go bankrupt (me not him cause all the bills were in my name). I vowed not to get in that situation again, but things only got worse, he would contribute even less money and spend more time not working - so he works an average 2 or 3 months a year and some years not at all, because he quits his jobs, starts complaining and threatening to quit after just a few days and he always has good excuses. Then he is content to not work as long as possible and as long as he has enough money to hoard and buy himself alcohol, he doesn't care whether we pay the bills or not. Now my daughter is a senior in high school. Amazingly in spite of her miserable childhood, she is a 4.0 student, a very talented violinist and talented in art and photography, and she wants to be a marine biologist. Her teachers cannot say enough good things about her and she doesn't do drugs, never been in any kind of trouble. She is headstrong and very angry at her dad, but is just a really good kid, mature and responsible for her age. And her boyfriend is a very nice young man and also mature and responsible and a talented violinist. But my controlling husband cannot stand the idea that his daughter would ever listen to any other man besides him (he totally does not get that he has alienated her so much she will NEVER listen to him and cannot wait to leave home to get away from him). So he is constantly making rude outrageous insults about her boyfriend and his family that are completely unjustified. And he does bizarre things, like one day she forgot to hide her little netbook so he goes and pries into the hard drive with a knife or something and screws it up so it won't work and all her data and homework assignments are lost, and he is just smirking with glee, thinking he has done something cute and clever, and she deserves this because she told him to shut up or something. Now his latest measure of control, he is going to refuse to provide his tax information so she cannot fill out her FAFSA and get financial aid from college. Not that his tax info is anything great, he made maybe $11,000 or $12,000 last year, but that is about the best he ever does. He has a CDL and is perfectly able to drive a big rig but he won't stick with it more than a few weeks because he is lazy. Finally the last trucking company he worked for had enough and they won't hire him back, and he insists they laid off most of their drivers due to the economy and he could not get a job anyway. Not true, I see trucks from this company all over the place, they haven't slowed down much. But anyway, my daughter will be unable to get any financial aid because her dad is such a jerk and won't provide his tax info. We do separate taxes and all our money is separate. I am laid off work right now and so is this bum, but he is not concerned and blames me for mismanaging my money because he refuses to pay even his share of the bills - let alone contributing for our daughter's needs. He figured by cutting off the money he could stop her violin lessons because I would not be able to afford them. He hates that she is talented in playing classical violin and is with a very top violin group, and orders her instead to play hick tunes with tinny sounding midi accompaniment she downloads from the computer at his direction. She won't cooperate so he gets infuriated and decides he will make sure she won't get to college then because he won't help her and he will prevent her from getting financial aid. She will be 18 in a few months, and I would leave if I could but am so deep in debt and no place to go be able to afford starting over and I am responsible for this dump of a trailer. He did put a new roof on it - himself - but only after allowing the roof to leak for over 5 years until it got so bad the ceiling tiles caved in and the rain water started pouring like a faucet right where he slept. Now the roof is somewhat fixed - except he did a lazy ass job and it still leaks over the woodstove. But the ceiling is still falling in. I can't fix it myself and haven't the money to do it and he won't. I am going to get behind on my bills real soon and risk losing my car so I won't even have transportation to go back to work which is absolutely essential. If I have to, I will choose the car and walk away and sign this dumpy trailer over to the park manager. But it is crammed with junk because its way too small and my health is ruined and I am clinically depressed but have no money for doctors and no energy to deal with it when I do get a few weeks break off work as I am too traumatized figuring out how to pay the bills. Husband does nothing but eat up the food which he refuses to help pay for and leave piles of dirty dishes in the sink all day. Its all I can do to clean up his messes much less face the overwhelming task of sorting this junk so I could get out of here... even if I had a place to go, which I do not. Well I see from the multitude of posts, there are plenty of other impossible husbands out there, so I'm not alone and no solutions, but it feels good to vent anyway....
I mistakenly stayed with this man for 18 years for the sake of my children. They say people don't change, but they really do. He got out of the service and it went downhill from there. He has no friends other than trying to reconnect with old drug addict friends from high school. He cannot keep a job. He is rude, arrogant, and mean to waitresses, cashiers and people on the phone. He spends hours downloading porn. He does searches for teenage girls that he has met. He still searches for ex-girlfriends that have dumped him. He smokes in the bathroom and doesn't care that he exposes his kids to 2nd hand smoke. He abandoned me when I got breast cancer and left me to care for the house, kids, and drive myself to treatments. Luckily, I DO have friends who helped me. He was off fishing. When he was home, he was on the computer looking at porn. What goes around, comes around.
I thought I had married a saint of a man. I recently found out he has been keeping an account on a singles website, actually met other married women and photo shopped my image out of his profile picture. I just had a baby for this fool and this is the thanks I get?! Sure he is remorseful now after I kicked him out and threatened divorce. I have since tried to forgive him but it is always in my mind that he is not who I thought I married. Now he tries to go over board with being involved in church and swearing it was all a dumb mistake that he will regret for the rest of his life. But so what I will never forget finding out all that I did. I can't look at him the same and all i want now is for his lazy dumb ass to goo back to school so he can get a better job and I can stop working all together! We have a young child together and I don't want to be a single mom. I figure I don't have to love him to live off of his dumb ass! I will be pissed about this for years to come for sure.
Waaaaaah, he whines and bitches and works a boring job at a desk. When I met him, he made swords, and knives. He actually wanted to be active. Now, all he does is sit a desk job, come home and bitch that I sat home all day. I am bored with him. He is so dull. He passively says "my coworkers wife is a teacher, he drives bus for our son. He says you are married to a man!" No, this is his way of saying I am a man?? He is such a fat ass because he probably hates me for getting fatter, but yet, if I exercise, he gets mad at me for not picking up his slobby ass laundry all day. He snores all over me at night, doesnt wash his feet, and walks around like a king, I am through!
*Note from Anger Central
The Webmaster had a really bad day at work today, and saw this come in before he went home. He spent 2 minutes saying he had a bad day then asked what he could do for Mrs. Webmaster. Thank you for reminding him to be good to his better half.
I'm so damned angry at this mean alcoholic s.o.b. I married 5 years ago. He introduced me to smoking, gambling and drinking, nearly ruined my life took me away from my family and friends into a community state so he could further tell me he had rights to everything I worked so hard for all my life. I have tried and tried to get through to him, to help him only to be insulted, mentally, emotionally abused and demeaned. it's no use, guess I'll have to dump the loser. He's damaged goods and it's best for me to move on, still pissed I allowed him to take so much from me and to use me to further his bullshit addictions.
My husband is clearly a retard. At 35, he cannot pick out his own clothes in the morning and his mom still buys his clothes. The lease on his car is up in only a few months, yet when the dealership tried to sell him a new set of tires during an oil change, HE BOUGHT THEM! He has never purchased a home or even made his own car purchase. He makes a good income and cannot understand why he pays taxes at the end of year despite the fact he has no deductions. I have to manage his money for him because he cannot do so for himself, although he insists on trying. We never go to dinner unless I help him save up in advance. For Valentine's day, he gave me a key chain, and for the second year in a row, his parents gave him an inadequate gift certificate for a fancy restaurant. He does not know enough to pick up after himself without being told. I cannot teach him a darn thing. He always tries to wrestle me or even hug me from behind and in the process smashes my breasts, causing much pain. He is nothing short of terrible in bed and I won't even discuss his physical attributes. I have my reasons for staying but it gets more difficult each day...
I am sick of my husband, to the point I wish he would just go away..he works, he drinks, he gripes about not having anything he wants (not needs)...mind you he doesn't make alot of money and I sell real estate so I don't get a paycheck til the house closes...it would take everything he makes to just pay the bills but he has to spend more than our house payment on beer and cigarettes each month....which causes us to be behind on bills and when I get a check I catch up on bills and all he does is gripe that he didn't get anything out of my pay...even though I have told him where everything goes he don't believe me...I am really getting to the point I hate having him around..I have changed my life to live by christ but he just gripes all the time that nothing goes right...wonder why??
Oh crap, i think i just logged on to the twilight zone! i think everyone on here has the same issues i do. a crappy husband that can't/will not provide and God forbid there to be any step children (Of course I mean YOUR children) Because you treat them soooo much better and you always have to make sure they have what they want. Well guess the F### what, they are CHILDREN. YOU ARE NOT! I despise him and i am going to leave this time. I can't tell you how many times I have been kicked out of MY house that I pay the RENT on! i want out, i just gotta figure out how! my soul has already packed up! good luck to you other ladies.
My husband is a selfish asshole. I'm currenly in medical school and I will graduate this May. I work one day a week when possible for a little spending money. My parents pay for our home, my car, my cell phone, and my insurance. Every time I ask for a dime he tells me he is broke. There are days when I don't have money to eat lunch. But he always has money to go out with his friends at least three times a week. I can't wait for the day I'm banking and I won't give him a cent.
What an a-hole!
Married five years and pooling our money I was dumb enough to sign a pre-nupt so "his land" could stay in "his family". All I ever wanted was to have a place to live the rest of my life and no worries. Right now he's not even talking to me. What did I do? I went to visit my grown daughter (26) for the first time in 2 years and agreed to only spend $300 and air/rental car expenses. Well, a week with a 5 year old grandson and nothing to do, we had to go to the movies, go shopping and go sight seeing a little. I ended up spending a total of around $1500. The husband went ballistic! If I could have only video recorded his ass! You really would have laughed. He was screaming and talking to himself walking from the computer room through the living room into his bedroom and I could hear him talking to himself in his bedroom, but not make out the words. Two days later I spent $1.79/lb on some grapes and he went off again!!
I work full time too and take a measly $25/week to spend. The income tax refund has been spent on "the farm" with new fences, etc. and I've not gotten my half in five years. Who really should be mad here? ME! AND I AM! If he never talks to me again it might be too soon and if he expects an apology he will be waiting a very, very long time. I could use an "I'm sorry" out of him, but I don't know that I would just go on as though nothing has happened. He just doesn't get the fact that the money seems to be only running one way.
My husband is so damn selfish! We used to have fun together, before we got married that is,,,and now all he ever does is criticize everything I ever do! I am so sick and tired of playing his freaking housemaid around the house. I don't understand why I've put up with this abuse for so long, he's out right now enjoying a few beers with some guys he just met,,,is he gay? I don't know anymore! I'm so damn angry!!! I'm here at home on a friday night alone with my 3 year old! He totally ignores his duties as a husband AND father!!! Any, and I do mean ANY excuse to get out of the house and escape to an internet cafe to do some 'work', he does that!!! Oooooooo! I am SO SO SO ANGRY!!!! UGH!!!!
My husband Steven died shortly after Christmas of 2005..and I am so angry at him because he was such an asshole. He was a mean alcoholic that felt people owed him. He was a wanna be cop and would always carry a gun like he was really someone of authority. I hate him for his attitude toward life and me. He was such a mammas boy that I hated everytime he would drink our bill money and they turn around and call his mother to bail him out and she would all the time. He was a 46 year old that couldn't let go of his momma tittys. When he was diagnosed terminal I couldn't wait till he died that is how misrable my life was. Then he died and you think his MOTHER would at least want to bury him. HELL NO! Not one penny did his dam family from Arizona contirbute to bury their dam son. So I cremeated him an threw his ashes just out. Now I am so very happy because that ass hole is gone. And I have no regrets for feeling the way I do. I hope he is rotting in hell for what he put me through.
My husband really gets on my nerves. I know we say we love each other and all but he is a selfish prick. We only have sex when he feels like it, go out when he feels like it, have fun when he feels like it. TOnight he decided to spend the whole night out to paint and fix up his business. I called and told him this is not normal and we had an agreement that you are not to stay out all night. He thinks that because he is right around the corner i am supposed to put up with this bs. he is a piece of shit that walks all over me. I know I deserve better and God will release me from this as*hole one day...hopefully soon.
i married someone who firmly believes he is smarter than me and everyone around me. he sold me when we were dating that he was the kind of person who had faith in everyone and didn't judge people - what a joke - he judges everyone and finds them all wanting. he is a slob but blames me for a messy house - if i say anything he says why should he bother he does the outside work - oh that's right mowing the lawn once every 2 weeks or so and not at all in the winter - whew what a job. or he is exhausted from dealing with all the idiots at his job all day he can't do anything but watch his tv when he gets home. although i work more hours than he does he wants dinner on the table when he gets home. he is belittling, mentally abusive to me and my family, and EVERYTHING is every one else's fault. i think i am angriest at myself for not getting the balls to leave. lastly he doesn't parent - he wants to be the pal and the good guy and has no problem telling my son that i am a bitch and an idiot and so on. terrible thing to do to a child. i keep telling him we are responsible for raising this child to be a great adult but he doesn't seem to be able to think past his own self. if it will be the least bit inconvenient for him then my son does what he wants - and he builds me up as the bad guy. i ache inside from all this - wish i could leave!
*Note from Anger Central
The Angry Webmaster is the first to announce that he is married to a woman far smarter then he is, In fact she is the most beautiful, intelligent, nicest...
Sugermouth husband! You be quiet! (Mrs. Angry Webmaster)
In all seriousness, it may not be to late to save this marriage, but he has to want to. If he has a family member that you can talk to that he will listen to, (And who has a greater degree of subtlety then the Webmaster, as him/her for help
I was widowed for 1 year, he sweet talked me, married me, talked me into putting his name on my house. So after THAT he kicks my daughters out. I sell my house, which was put in his name and I got hit with paying 14,777.00 in back child support the bastard owed. Now he's at his son's graduation, staying with his ex-wife while I work. I got my check from WORK today...he doesn't work. I took it, rented a truck, and when he gets back he will come here to nothing. The son of a bitch meanest asshole on earth. An alcoholic, insensitive jerk. Hope he rots in hell!
*Note from Anger Central
We're sorry that your marriage was bad, but you should be much better off now. Good luck.
just now we were putting defleaing stuff on our cats.. mind u i'm pregnant and the chemical is soooo smart so we do it then after i get my son and i realize my husbabd has a nasty attitude i'm like whats wrong no answer wtf is wrong with u? if i have to tell you you'll never know right caz i'm phycic it turns out its ftiggen microwave food he's pissed i didnt think to microwave the food but evvvvery day its something evveryday he does everything i do nothing and he yells at me and makes me feel worthless mind u i take care of the baby 24/7, am pregnant and already promised to do sum things he needs done later annd i changed my dr. appointment even though i might have been able to xsee my baby for the first time sooo angry i am soooooo tired of being treated like i do nothing asshole!
My husband is out of work right now... which we are dealing with. He is looking for a job, and that is good. But He complains about having to stay at home with the kids. Something I would LOVE to do. And today our only car broke down and I had to find a way home. The person giving me a ride offered to help me get my battery to the auto parts store and check to see if that is what was wrong. I called my husband to tell him and he says "No, come home now. I'm tired of watching the kids today and our friend is taking me out for beers." So now i am here at home and my car is not getting fixed. Grrrrrr!
My husband makes me so angry. First, he thinks that it's OK to always be too tired to do anything with our kid on the weekend. Hey, buddy, I work too, make 3 x what you do and have a high stress job (I'm a physician, he's a teacher). When he is up with our kid on the weekend and even after work during the week he just sits and watches TV with him. I can count on one hand the numbers of times he has ever taken our kid out by himself on the weekend.
He also likes to make beer. This is a problem as he also likes to drink to excess. This is becoming more and more of a problem with him drinking when I take our kid out. I took our kid out yesterday AM as my husband said he was going to go shopping and do some work around the house...right! When we came home 5 hours later he was drunk. He gets so obnoxious when he drinks and answers all questions in a rude way. When I confronted him about it, he instead turns to an issue I have with weight gain. Mind you, I'm actually going to the gym, losing weight and am not really that overweight to begin with. He thinks he's so cute by asking 'why do think people didn't notice you were pregnant until so late in your pregnancy.' Hello, where the hell is this coming from...our kid is now 4. When I tell him that I was carrying well (I was and am not fat) and ask him what does he mean by this question, he answers that is only trying to get me to give him a real answer and be honest. WTF, asshole?! You sitting there drunk with a father who died of esophageal cancer, caused from his alcoholism is insinuating that I'm overweight instead of looking at your own HUGE problem of being a functional alcoholic. SO sick of all of this. Think I'm getting divorce and he can go live by himself, sleep all he wants and enjoy life in a tiny apt as that is all he can afford...I'm the one who got us the huge house with my salary. Enjoy, asshole!!!
I am so angry that my husband returned from his tour of Afghanistan 3 days ago and he thinks everything is about him, what he wants and needs. He acts like I sat on my behind the last year without for kids. There is no love shown and he is distant.To top it all off...he starting doing snus (a tobacco chew). He is a different person and I am so angry all I can do is cry!
*Note from Anger Central
First, go to your husband and tell him you love him then thank your husband for us for going over there. Second, Thank you for being there for him when he came back. Please understand that a few weeks ago he was literally on a knife edge, not knowing if that person walking towards him was a suicide bomber or if that pile of trash was a bomb. He needs time to decompress.
Yes, it is going to be hard for you for a while. We hope that you have the strength to carry on as your husband readjusts to you and your children. Please remember that YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Many many other wives and husbands have gone through and are going through what you are. Seek them out.
No one at Anger Central has served in our military but we support both the troops and their loved ones. There is a large network of people both in and out of the military who can help you. It doesn't even need to be official. It may be you talk to another wife, who talks to her husband who then invites your husband out for some fishing and poker. They can just talk about what they went through. Give it time and be willing to put up with things for a while. If you work at it, we're sure it will all be good in the end.
We do agree about the chewing tobacco. :p
(Actually the nicotine does help them relax without damaging the lungs)
He'll give it up eventually. Please don't ride him about it though.
Good luck and thank you again for your sacrifices as well as those of your husbands.
My husband is a fucking shithead, jerk. He constantly flirts with every female he knows. He is constantly on fb flirting with females and then wonders why Im mad and nothing is happening in the bedroom. Stop Flirting and Cheating. You idiot!
I am fed up. My husband works every night until 10 or 11 and leaves me home to take care of my 1 1/2 old daughter. Did i mention i work a full time high stress job? We never go out or anywhere. He does zero in helping around the house or with the child, never got up with her once when she was an infant. Oh by the way it was him that wanted a child. If and when he is home he either does his "paperwork" or sleeps. He's not around on holidays and eventhough Sundays are supposed to be family days he does all "his" errands that he couldn't get done during the week. He is a hard worker i'll give him that but no compromise his way or no way. I am basically a single parent and get no love or affection. I have put up with more bs from this guy than you can imagine. We fight constantly and of course i am the one that nags because i ask for help. I have tried to communicate my unhappiness verablly and even resorted to texts and emails to get his attention and he ignores me. Did i mentione how he didnt help me through my pregnancy, slept during the baby prep classes, and showed up late (when i needed him the most) when i was in labor. His excuse, he had to have breakfast with his mommy. Who by the way he brought to live with use for 5 months to help with the baby and all she did was wake me up when I was trying to get rest. I keep thinking he will change, make some kind of effort, come home early occasionally to eat dinner with his daughter. Fat chance. The latest is his second trip (for 5 days)in a month and a half to visit his dying friend . Ok fine, very noble but this after he tells me how busy he is and cant even take off two hours to take his daughter to the DR.(Oh he works for himeself and can make his own hours but its me that has to take off work and use vacation time) He wouldn't dream of going on vacation with his family he's just too busy. Busy, Busy, Busy unless its something for himself. He is selfish man and I am sick, sick, sick of this life.
My husband cheated on me a few months ago with some random slut while he was "blacked out" drunk. BULL. SHIT. He made the goddamn choice to be that drunk, and I'm damn sure he remembers it. He claims he didn't plan it. BULLSHIT AGAIN. I saw the messages he was sending her on Myspace (yeah, fucking Myspace) weeks before he fucked her and he had the nerve to claim he'd sent them afterward in an attempt to "scare her off." Yeah, that makes REAL sense, sweetheart, I hit on guys all the time so they'll leave me alone, doesn't everyone? What a dipshit. I am ANGRY at him, and like a MORON I agreed to give him a second chance, but all he's done since is make me feel guilty for being angry in the first place! You know what? Fuck him. Fuck him and everything he's ever done to hurt me. I'm finished with him.
My husband is so f*ing cheap!! I swear. He thinks the money is HIS, as if my job as a stay at home mom doesnt count for anything! It's ridiculous. I do SO much for him, including little things like sending notes in his lunch just to let him know i care. What do i get? nothing. We've been together 5 years and he's bought me flowers 1 time. Nothing for our anniversaries..not even the first one. NOTHING for my birthday. NOTHING for ANY holiday. I am so unappreciated. SO CHEAP! Wondering what he'll think about paying fucking child support and shit after i take his house. Keep it up asshole and we'll be divorced. Be thankful for what you have! Sweetie, i know i'm smokin hot...i can get another man. Learn to show some appreciation.
emotional abuser and cheat we have been married only 2 years..he is already flirting and scouting around for other women. He works at a local prep high school and i can always tell when he is lusting over some high school girl in his class...he will start talking about her alot and even telling me her medical history,. He also teaches a sunday school class and has started making personal jabs at me in the form of joking...the bible is clear about getting rid of all malice and jesting which are improper...he has also started attending nude gatherings at peoples home... i do not go with him. When he comes back home he will go on and on about the women he saw there and how much they weighed... that is one reason I do not undress in front of him anymore.. he is way too critical of women and the bodies they have. He told me about a woman who was at the last gathering he attended.. he said she was slender and a recent widow who had collected a good sized insurance settlement when her husband dies... she is a traveling nurse. he knows where she lives and has tried numerous times to get me to go see her and befriend her. he tells me he is only doing it for me to have a friend.. I think I can make my own friends ty very much. And since when does having a new house built and a large insurance settlement become a criteria for a friend? Sounds like he is wanting to make a move on her himself and use me to do it. The reason I say this is because I have gone places with him before and he will tell me that he is too tired to walk with me but then the very next minute I look around he is in the swimming pool laughing away with other women after telling me he was just too tired to do anything with me. I persoanlly think he just lies too often to me and then thinks I am too stupid to know the difference.... Another thing he told me was that when I talk to him for 30 minutes.. he feels like I hold him captive which reminds him of his mother.... oh really now... he feels captive with me talking to him for 30 minutes out of a whole day.. but he goes online looking at porn and chatting to other women for HOURS and HOURS. As far as the like my mom comment... unless he was sleeping and having sex with the mom since when does a wife remind the man of his mom. I am getting the feeling that he is just a player. His actions do not line up with his words.
He disrespects me in front of my friends and family. I have never been more embarrassed! He's verbally abusive and manipulative. If I ever got the courage to get out of this unhappy marriage i would never re marry again. He likes to physically hurt me just to the point of there not being any bruising or any other evidence.
*Note from Anger Central
The Webmaster used to work with a turd on two legs just like the slime ball you are dealing with. There was no violence, but much emotional abuse. His wife finally left him and did it in a beautiful way. During her birthday party, with all their friends there, she turned the slob and said "Today is my birthday and this is my present to myself." She then served him the divorce papers and walked out.
Now, if scumbag is actually physically abusing you, seek immediate help. There are many organizations who can work with you and with a little luck slam this coward into prison.
As we have said before, we hate seeing a marriage break up, but there are cases when it should end, and it sounds to us that yours is one of those cases.
Please seek help ASAP for your own safety as well as peace of mind. Please remember that most men are not slimeballs.
There are many wonderful things about my husband and hes a good supporter of our family. But I am disabled. I have good days and bad days. When he comes home from work if somethin is not to his liking or expectancy he starts ranting and raving his voice gets lounder with ill tones and starts complaing...acusing and belittles us especially me. He doesn't hardly cuss but for ninteen years of marriage I fell he has taken the joy out of my life and relaced it with bitterness. I insults me and says things to hurt my feeling. He aplogizes later about his temper tantrum and says he knows he doesn't handle things well. When he gets this way I call 911 when it's out of hand and he waits for them so he can have his say first. Then they look at me as an ungrateful wife. They take his side and then leave. They don't listen to what I have to say about how scared I am to talk to him about anything and I know there's going to come a time when he is going to hurt me and then I will have to shoot him. That's what makes me so sad.
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